I angrily grumble and fire another blast of confetti out of my ConfeGun, creating a new, identical house. I quickly dig a huge pit to the left and put a huge sign reading "OI PIE IN HERE IF YOU STAY HERE FOREVER AND DO NOTHING". I hide inside my house and wait.

/me hugs you peeps like I hug confetti. AKA pretty darn hard.

Who is skeletron prime? I'm concerned for your well being and sanity, pi.

/hugs pi like someone about to fall into a pit of sharks and is grabbing at a tree root

*Becomes Pyro*
HHHMPFHMPFHHHMPFF
*Burns Everyone and Everything*
/HMMPF

Hello?
*See blood everywhere in the broken house*
I guess it's time to clean up the house.
*Begin to sweep the floor with his broom*

Aha! But I used mah spark of life!
I'm not sure I enjoy these battle sprites... Why? Why not horses? Or hover boards? Steeds are awesome, better than little puff balls who follow you around and fail epically when you finally need them.

/hugs Popoixd until he feels debilitated

Hi everyone~!
/ducks as flames and hammers fly above. O.O
/looks at the ground wondering where did the blood came from. Oh.. >.>
/sit down on the blood free ground and watches the chaos and mayhem.
/thinks, "I want some candy.. :L"

/hugs everyone like the fur on a woolly mammoth.

/watches a random body flying across the sky.

I'm not sure I like that analogy, No one. Maybe I should hug you guys to death. Oh, sorry did I say that homocidal urge aloud? Oh dear, my thin veneer of sanity on the surface must be slipping away into a sea of craziness? S who here is psyched for Xmas!!! I played Splinter Cell to Christmas carols the other day... Kinda an oximoron. Stealthy death and Chriatmas trees, uh uh uh. No way, hose. So how's your head?

/hugs everyone like a zombie hugs a survivor about to be bitten and infected.

Oh hi there Ace. What did you miss, you ask?

-A lesser deity exploded.
-Houses randomly appeared everywhere.
-A bunch of people playing Spiral Knights went ballistic and destroyed everything in their path. More than they usually did, at any rate.
-I made up a really bad Christmas parody.
-Magic came in here and beat the tar out of Logic, Reason, and Rhyme.
-This thread SPIRALed from PG-13 to rated R due to the violence.
-I just decided to go on a verbal rampage with axe puns.

You know, the usual.

No worries, Pipipipipi. I've got a plan. First, I use a Spark of Life on everyone dead here. Then, I go to the Alchemy machine.

/think "Why can't we randomly combine items here?"

{Who says you can't?}

GREAT IDEA! First, I'll combine two snAXE; chocolate and toffee. I made Tofolate candy!

Now, I combine a Spark of Life, an Emergency Revive device, a Love Puppy, a Health Pad, and a pill of confetti. This makes a weird potion that I use on Pipipipipi. Now his hugs restore health the harder he hugs, like a Love Puppy!

Now, time for something so stupid that'll AXEtually blow up your brain.

My Christmas parody, some random famous really bad singer, an-

{You know when you fly off the handle? Well you just did an acrobatic pirouette off it into a barrel of explosives.}

Shush, Brackets.

/e hugs you people like Gollum hugs his ring. MY PRECIOUS!

Other things that happened

-Sandwich hyjacked my 12 days of Christmas parady
-I got HAMMERZ
-Sandwich is mean >:(
-I made a joke about Sandwich being mean but Sandwich isn't
-I ate Sandwich-Potato
-I barfed him/her out
-I ate a Sandwich
-I ate a Potato
-I ate a Sandwich-Potato *burp*

/hugs Ace like I got HAMMERZ, and makes him explode because I over healed him

I don't think tha- hang on a second

/barfs out potion and Sandwich-Potato, who I then re-eat

/begins to focus and draws aura in a specific pattern..
/thinks, "..Now!"
/explodes the jar and appears from his remains.
I sorta learned that in my dreams, sorry for leaving a mess to whoever is close by. XD

I think I see and understand of what my parents think of me now.. As long as they continue to worry about me and what I do, I don't think they will ever enjoy having me around. It just makes my existence seem like a burden and tries to push my emotions to their limits to make me fail or lose hope and willpower. Today, my mother was informed about my cellphone being taken away from me because I didn't really expect it to be considered as malpractice to carry it in your pocket during the exam. They took my phone and on top of that I told her about how I lost my ATM card in my own bag. /think, "My parents are never going to see and realize what is my true potential nor understand the fact that people or something out of reality is misplacing my things.." A couple of months ago, I had a TI-84 Silver Edition and I always kept it safe. One day, my parents discussed with me on Skype, phone, or whatever that I didn't need it because we are not allowed to use advanced models. The next morning, I listened to their advice and I stored it in my closet or room. After a few days, I was not able to find it in the same location. The most logical explanation to a human being is to say that I lost, misplaced, or someone stole it. Problem is, that logic wouldn't make sense to me because I always kept my room locked before I left for college. Regardless of getting good or bad scores, they are going to make sure they take me back. When I listened to my mother's quick lecture, all I basically understood from it was that I was a disgraceful, irresponsible, idiot that just came here to waste my time. Hmph.. /thinks, "I was never able to keep up with the system and time zone until now, I have been spending the last couple of days studying all night rather than playing games, and they think I am not capable to do anything right over here.. >.>"

/hugs ya like snowmen huddled around a Christmas tree.

/spits out duct tape onto Thowardz

oh look,

/eats a Potato-Sandwich

yum

/hugs everybody like I'm me and kills everybody

THAT"S IT!
*presses admin regen*
STOP DESTROYING THE HOUSE I MADE, AND I FIXED, AND I FIXED, ALL OVER AGAIN!
please.
*sets up shield around Ace and Noon*
Glad to see you guys back.

Whew, exams are almost over and I hope that I did good on all of them. My spirit is up like a firecracker!

Now.. What to do for the next 2 and a half weeks of break? XD

Nice to see ya too Fire~ :D

/hugs everyone like a shrimp that curls up into a wheel.

Edit: Why is this double posted!?

Yeah... ALLELUIA! Excited for Christmas? Or whatever you celebrate? Anywho, I'm glad Pipipipipi ain't here because it is almost tranquil now. Sooooo who here likes waffles?

/hugs everyone like a pelt hugs a cat.

Oh thanks Iam,

/eats a brownie

/hugs everyone like something, and kills everyone

WhY?!? ;_;

oh boy, it snowed where I live, you know what that means...

/throws snowballs at everyone, and makes hot chocolete

/hugs everybody like I'm cold and want to get warm, which I do, and kills them all, except Xspiral since he/she is wearing a marshmallow coat

where can I get one of those?

/searches for a marshmallow coat

C4?! Wait WAIT! Why do you do this?! I'm Compleatly innocent and also everyone else! You are going to be a suspect birddy and you will go to ja-
*all C4 exploded...*
Oh come on! The house is gone because of that snipe?! This is serious you quirky little bird...
*Build a sturdy metal cage just for harmful bird*
Now get into the cage! What? You don't want to? The I have to use force if I must!
*Shoot Mallawak with his sticky gun*

*Put Mallawak into the cage*
*Put the cage into the sturdy small lockbox*
*Put the lockbox into the iron barrel*
*Put the iron barrel into the empty fireproof wooden chest*
*Put the chest into the big save box*
*Put the save box into the cardboard box*
Let's see... Stamp... Address... Name... Guesse it done for now. I will sent you to the North Pole. You may see Santa but he won't give a present for naughty bird.

And now... I will hug Pipipipipi's once more with my juicy banana suit.
/hugs Pipipipipi like a banana hug an orange.

Hey guys~
...
I gotta go. I'm not sure how things in life will work out for me so, I am not sure if I'll ever come back on SK again. In advance, I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year~! :D Bye everyone, it was nice knowing all of you and I hope everyone was nice this year. ;D

Noon, I tried my best to catch up with the way things work around here but I wasn't fast enough. As you already know, my Dad has come to take me home. I am not going to argue with my Dad or anything because my Dad always looks for what is good for me and my Dad is scared about how I am living. For example, my Dad says I lost a lot of weight (It sounds like I have been starving for ages. XD) Even though, I eat a lot of food. /thinks, "Probably I have good metabolism..? >.O"

Either way, I am always drawn to the places that need me, right Fire? XD
I think I already know about what I am need there for besides studying and keeping my parents being worried sick about me.
As peaceful things were over there, I now know that my first brother needs me and my guidance whether or not he admits it.
Later~!
/salute

Oh! One more thing I have to tell Fire, remember the day we discussed about the 7 blades of light and 13 blades of darkness and what was the blade I was wielding? I remembered the next day but I never remembered or gotten the chance to tell ya. The blade was forged out of my rl memories. I used this blade in rl as a toy against my brothers when we were little. And no, the blades we played with were made out of plastic. The blade is white to the metal and the handle was pure black. I'm not sure if it had a black ribbon attached to its end when I forged it in my dreams. I know the toy didn't. XD

/hugs everyone like a bag of goodies.

█▀▀█ ▄
░░▀▄ ░
█▄▄█ ▀

We'll all miss you by no small amount Ace. Can you still be on the forums?

/e tosses some confetti into the air. I USED CONFETTI FOR YOU ACE.

I've informed Cuq already and the rest of the guild. Wait no I didn't since Sandwich-Potato is not Pennzqwu and is not in Ominous. Totally. Legit.

{If I weren't being sad, I would be annoying again.}

I hope you can come back, but it's fine if you don't. But remember, if you can't, those memories of the game will always be with you. The guild just joking around (and apparently licking people). Discovering stupid glitches and laughing your face off (like that time when you killed Vanaduke on Elite with a Polaris since he stopped targeting you).

But still, we need a good honorable way to remember Ace.

21 HUG SALUTE. Love Puppies, the Petrode, Nonna, Mewkats, each of the Monster Pockets, a Snipe, a Gobble Snipe, a Stranger, confetti, Mecha Turrets, each Battle Sprite, you, Cuquinha (Aether), Iamnoone, other peeps on this thread, myself, and Brackets.

{HEY GET AWAY FROM M-}

BULL RUSH TACKLE HUG.

/e hugs everyone like confetti. Which is pretty damn hard.

...
how?
How did I miss this?
*cries*
Ace.
If you can come back to read this.
Thanks for helping me out.
And..
That sounds...interesting.
/salute(and breaks down right afterward)
/salute
Hope to see you in the near future.

You know what? I am ready to give a FUDGING SPEECH ABOUT DIS:

Today, my friends, my fellow peers, my companions, allies, and supporters, today we mourn the loss of a brave cavalier. His brevity is unparalleled, nor his refusal to give up (in no way influenced by his "NO I SHALT NOT GIVE YOU MAH CONFETTI. Totally.) despite Murphy's Law. One of our finest, we are all saddened by the loss of such a wonderful comrade. He braved the depths of the citadel, taking down the bulwark titan at its apex. He rummaged through the gloomy forests, venturing on where most men would grow pale and have shaky knees, cutting down the callous beast who so cruelly slew our men. He stomped through the viscous chateau, felling it's owner and residing creature. He survived the worst Gremlin traps, saving Haven forevermore on more than one count.

Today, my comrades, we lament the absence of such an excellent savior, such a beacon, a light in the darkness of our foes. A rock that we held onto amidst a sea of despair. An eagle, who caught us when we fell. A friend we all treasured, and all bewail his passing. Truly, such a loss threatens to dampen our festive celebrations, to silence our joyous cries of snowball-throwing, to bring tears to even the harshest of Grinchlins.

And yet. And yet. We, as the whole of the Spiral Order do know how his last sentiments would be as thus: Mourn me not, my fellow chevaliers. Remember with a smile the fortunate time I could remain, and consider myself like a brother among our ranks. MAY OR MAY NOT BE PARAPHRAS-

{You DO know this is being recorded, right?}

...Oops?

Ace was a defender of our cause, a stalwart hero of our goals. He would not let anything harm us if he could help it; he saved Haven innumerable times, cultivated a close group of friends, and above all, never gave up.

Today, we mourn. Tomorrow, we laugh. In a few weeks, we may yet cry with joy to discover that our closest comrade has returned. May you be granted safe passage to return to our ranks and serve once more.

As Vog blesses, with his fiery compassion.

I... don't do anything.

I am no hero but I appreciate your kind words.

This is to all those who gave me hope, knowledge, and strength. Wherever you are Noon, I hope you can learn what I am about to say too....

My life was a living nightmare I continue to strive and make peace with. I spent 20 years, from the very beginning, trying to fix the problems that were never meant to be fixed. I was lied to by my birth father. He lied about loving or caring for us. My mother, the one who gave birth to me, was innocent and had nothing to do with the wrongdoings my birth father accused her of. I was barely aware of what was happening but I was slowly falling into despair at the age of 4. I was called insane and crazy assumed I only spoke lies because everyone around me said so. I was quiet before I spoke and even quieter after. People used to assume the first 6 years of my life I had no voice to speak and took advantage of that to their personal agendas. My birth father was a very abusive man who only wanted the world underneath his feet. A sociopath and kind person at heart but his sociopath part took advantage of every moment he could get. I later confirmed this with my life by hearing what my mother's relatives had to say about him. "He was a kind man who loved helping out and being there for everyone. Then, he suddenly changed into the person we see before you were even born...." He is no longer a father or man with a heart. His pride and selfishness surpasses him that he no longer remembers his mistakes or pain he causes. My mother, the one who gave me birth, was a victim no one, even myself, was able to see. She was subjected to daily abuse and threats against me and my two siblings. She would do her best to endure it and protect us. The birth father would get into blood-filled fights with her relatives and us just watching without much concern or thought because of how often we hear fighting. It was 2007 and my mother brought a restraining order against the birth father. Two cops escorted him outside and to jail for a sentence under domestic abuse. The brothers filled with hate against their mother caused a lot of noise and problems in the house. It was clear they did not know what was really happening. A couple days later a stranger knocked on our door and I sensed it could be our birth father. I was also lacking awareness of the situation and checked all windows seeing the stranger and our birth father waiting in the parking lot. Out of joy, I opened that door and went to him. All of this happening I did not consider who was right or wrong, only the fact all of them were my family and I was glad they're all safe. My mistakes within the family started earlier than that moment but it was here where life could have been different for better or worse.

Our mother was at work or the store, I did not remember but we all packed our belongings and went with him. We stayed at an apartment where his friends lived since we had not many options. Around this time, school started and things seemed to be well. Then one day, one of the siblings adjusted the thermostat because of the hot weather outside. The friend that owned the apartment came back drunk that day and shouted then threatened the birth father to leave or he would contact the police because he is technically a criminal for kidnapping children without the mother's consent, who actually had custody over us. We left that day and stayed in the car all night until the birth father found a place for us to stay. It was heart breaking to see someone actually spending all their energy to find you a place to stay so you can sleep comfortably. I was unsure by this time if he was actually a bad person or misunderstood. It was the few years after i found a partial answer. I was like a caretaker of my two brothers doing their laundry, helping with homework, and making sure food was reheated and prepared. We had no problems and laughed together until the day our birth father challenged that calmness. He started asking them 'how long are they going to rely on me doing things for them? Are they really men if I am doing everything for them? And especially laundry?' He got an immediate answer as they slowly showed bitterness and hatred towards me. I was staring birth father down like he was some evil mastermind. It was around this time I joined Spiral Knights in 2012.

We had court hearings and stuff. I was the lead informative to the judge knowing what to say and doing it truthfully. She was a really kind and serious person. I'm glad I met someone like her. With the partial info I know, I explained to her how my mother tossed my homework aside when I spent my time visiting her doing homework. I only understood now that she felt hurt by the neglect I have shown towards her. I was the least desired child out of the three and my brothers assumed opposite seeing how I was mostly ignored for my accomplishments but, more importantly to them, my mistakes. They would direct their hatred at me in any way possible as I silently accepted their abuse. I was the oldest sibling but I had no intent in hurting them because of how much I cared and lacked the knowledge to correct and teach them. I was aware I was only a child assumed or forced to follow the role of a parent and adult. Shortly after, I also realized, by my discussions with Noon, I played as a sub-role to birth father as his wife. It was unexpected or unseen but his treatment towards me in terms of abuse and demands seemed likewise. The outcome of the trial was the birth father gained custody over us and received child support. A few months to a year later, birth father abused me over something, I did not remember, and broke my glasses demanding I go outside and work. In tears, I left home somewhat blind and ran into my oldest brother. It was at this moment I realized how much he still cared about me asking what happened and everything. However, that seemed to have changed as time went on. I did not completely leave home by then because I returned in the middle of the night. The police and my mom was at the apartment we stayed near George Washington High school. Within that year, that is when we met the "mom" I've been mentioning to Noon.

It was our step mom but our dad asked us to call her mom because she demanded it from us. Later, he would force it upon us. We thought she was a kind lady who was trying a bit too hard to be a mom but gives us the support we needed. I felt something was off though but I was not in tune with my instincts back then. It was around this time I learned my talent of pattern reading from my professor giving light on a nightmare I had. The nightmare was me taking the exact same test with the exact same problems but I lacked the memory to know the answers beforehand. He explained to me some people have the ability to see the patterns of life and the world around them. Things happen so often or at a pace where it seems repetitive that those individuals would see or know the patterns of what happens next. This also means it is possible if I try improve this skill it can become something very unique and helpful in the future. So, I took his advice to heart after explaining how it might relate to my copycat technique. The one and only talent or skill I was born with as opposed to everyone else who has one in some practical area or more. This was around the time I learned about the anime called Naruto and caught parts of the anime when I visited my older uncle's house before the separation. I learned about the Sharingan and how it copied other techniques and abilities. With my imagination and partially weak copycat ability, I tried to copycat the copycat (Sharingan) through how Sasuke used it. By looping through the few episodes I could watch, I eventually evolved my ability to have similarities to the Sharingan. The knowledge of my Sharingan-like copycat ability helped me grasp onto the concept of pattern reading. I slowly tried to evolve it through those concepts later realizing it be further evolved into time reading. Time reading is pattern reading but being able to see patterns far into the future knowing the events that goes on now. Little that I knew, I already had this ability subconsciously that was able to see 10-20 years into the future of my life with 100% accuracy. The nightmares I mentioned to Noon were actually signs trying to tell me what was about to happen or already happening without me consciously aware.

By the end of high school, it was already late for applying for college. I was blamed for my lack of knowledge and step mom was living with us. Out of hairbrain idea, birth father decided I should be sent to India and study to be an engineer. I declined at first and that led to me getting abused more. I eventually agreed and tried my best to study there. I was years behind the material because American and Indian study layout are completely different so I was failing all the classes even after staying up every night studying for them. I made a few friends and was known as some kind of freshman hero or something standing up to rowdy Seniors, doing small things to help students, and even help or educate the staff on material we cover in America. I did not know everyone's opinion about me but people never complained about having me around. The class was even willing to help me out to catch up with learning and homework but I refused telling them to focus on their work. Even on final exam day, I had bad luck. My phone was ringing during testing after I turned it off. I still wonder how it turns itself back on and my only guess was the weight of the bag pressing the power button. I was about to turn it off but the professor called out and assumed I was cheating. I was dismissed and failed the exam. I even spoke to the professors but they were all in disbelief. It was during Christmas vacation, I sensed birth father came to India and he did appearing 3 days later.

I was barely playing Spiral Knights then because the poor Wi-Fi. He assumed my failure was due to me playing games instead of studying but his real motives was to bring me back by force. He never told me his real motives but I am certain now it was because I was not monitored while I was at India. He has spied on me before when I was in America sending his friends to spy on me while I was at school and I would quietly approach and surprise them. He convinced me to come back saying my brothers were in some sort of danger to themselves and he could no longer control them. We went to his older brother's house or apartment in Banglore, I forgot the name of the place. I met my cousins I have not seen most of my life. Apparently, I looked like their twin sister as a baby but birth father did not like hearing that story. We went around talking and I even had to stay by them so they would not scared of the wild dogs. When I was in India, I learned to overcome my fear of dogs and even smile around the wild ones. They meant no harm because they were only trying to survive like us. Everyone felt terrified how calmly and happy I greet them and walk by while the locals and even my friends feared them because of the size of packs or by growl. After we reached America, I was abused and accused of wasting $22k then locked in the basement for an entire year given no freedom to speak or go anywhere. I was to prove myself by only studying for the SAT and ACT. They only gave me food when it came that time and chances to take a shower, as there was a half bathroom in the basement for brushing and other stuff. I failed the SAT 4 times but the accumulated score added up to 2200, the requirement for college entrance was 1800 at the time. I was accepted into Temple University primarily for nursing. After orientation, I decided to change for Computer Engineering so I did Electrical Engineering Computer focused or something like that. My father hated that. He demanded I become a doctor instead but I refused since he was not paying a cent for my college tuition. He did pay for my entrance fee though that was $200 but the rest was through grants and loans so I felt I had the freedom to make the call this time. It was this time 2014-2015 I returned to Spiral Knights and reconnected with Noon and others. Further but barely explaining what had happened since.

Noon was relieved I was still here and I continued to learn from her and what she had to say. I did well for my first college year and just missed the Dean's List by 0.01 or 0.02 for GPA. I did not care about it at first until a friend says the student receives a scholarship for it. I was pretty disappointed but laughing. By then, I was slowly remembering or grasping who I always was, a girl. I know by genitalia I was defined as boy but my facial appearance, behaviors, personality, interests, and goals all said otherwise. Noon encouraged me to see the world and go beyond my comfort zone to actually be who I am not what others demand or expect from me. I hesitated at first. I had no real income to support transitioning but I did research into it. During the entire first year of my college year, I learned all I could or needed to know about transitioning and was dead set on it. I managed to play games, hang out with friends, and even find time to sleep at college. I still got ahead of school giving me 2 months of pure freedom and prep for finals, each or one semester I forget which. I decided on work-study because I needed money to transition and support school tuition so I went to the Department of Engineering with formal black clothing and handed my resume saying this was for a job then left. I still remember asking after I was hired what my employer thought of me when I did that. She really thought I was serious and had lots of potential doing something really bold, formal, and brave. It was two months after that stunt during summer vacation, birth father received a call that I received a work-study job at Temple University. At the time, I was already forced to work at the local KFC restaurant which I did not agree with at first. I later thought it would be a good opportunity to learn how to interact with people. The employer and employees there were pretty cool and I liked them but I knew working at Temple would give me more knowledge on my future career. I did learn a lot at KFC and Temple. I tried to carry on everything I learned with at least exposure memory so I would not completely forget. I started to search places on foot to figure out how to transition and became successful finding a place and took the necessary steps needed for it. It was by the start of Fall 2015 semester when birth father had everyone searching my belongings. I remember it exactly after a long day of work and school without being able to shower or eat. They found my estrogen medications for HRT. Immediately, birth father tried to provoke me so we could get into a fight by touching an inappropriate place, my chest which was really sore. I refrained and he stated that I was playing an act this entire time so they would provide me a phone. I told them no. I did not need a phone so I unlocked it and placed it in front of step mother, the one who started this spiral of issues. From the moment I reached India, she told me her plan was to get revenge on birth father and make everyone close to him suffer. She only told me then because she was confident no one would believe me. Apparently, she was worse than birth father. With the chance of a fight between birth father and my two brothers, my mind were more in tune with the pattern reading ability quickly alerting me that combat would lead to him faking a murder by contacting police as self-defense and reporting I was crazy as my medications as evidence.

Oddly enough, I asked him why fight and he said the exact same things my mind predicted. He attempted to attack me several times but I barely evaded. Eventually, his blood pressure got to him and he quit the fight warning me I have until morning to leave with my belongings. I sat their feeling defeated. I did not feel the resolve to leave and thought in my heart "only if my brothers wanted me to leave". They whispered to each other about me as "it" hoping I leave or they would take matters into their own hands and kill me themselves. Just as birth father said "I can always be replaced. I was only a tool." I packed my things and decided to leave in the middle of the night. I wanted to take our puppy Mojo, a black and white pug-maltese. He protected me from when my brothers attacked in attempts to break my arms off and dislocate them. However, I had no money or place for him to call home. My deepest fear and regret was leaving him with them but at least he would have his needs met. So, I left without him there in the middle of the night in the rain wanting to say goodbye but could not as I was being watched being the next step of the police called on me. I took the route 20 SEPTA bus on my way to the Frankford Transportation Center. I was in pain physically and emotionally but continued carrying my things and walking. I took the Route 3 bus to Temple University. It was one of the most dangerous routes at night because it goes through Kensington, PA. One of the most common areas of gun violence. But, it was quiet that night with the rain coming down. I tried to smile hoping it was a good sign that I would survive and meet Mojo, my baby and puppy, once again. I went to the police station telling them the one last thing birth father demanded from me 'He was no longer responsible of me or my well-being." The officer I told assumed I was a runaway child making up excuses in total disbelief and advised I go back and apologize to him, even after explaining how he tried to kill me. Tired altogether, I found a place to rest. I cannot explain where because it would put the people that protected me in jeopardy of their jobs so I'll wait until they all retire and receive their pensions and stuff. It was a temporary spot but I at least felt a little more safe in order to sleep. A few days later, birth father found me through my friend contacts. He told me they already gave away Mojo. In shock and worry of Mojo's safety, I cried asking him where he was sent. I was given an address by then but I was never able to locate him during those times and later lost that address note due to memory loss. Birth father was trying to make a deal with me while my friends and security keeping a watchful eye from a distance. His deal was I go back with him and apologize to everyone, reverse my transition by lying to the doctors that helped me get this far, and obey every word he says. I declined with disgust realizing how cruel a person he can be. Then he pleaded a few times even returning my phone. I still declined then he began threatening me by saying he could throw me off the second floor we're sitting at and kill me right here. I told him to do it because at least I would die as myself in the end. He coward out knowing everyone watching would get him in trouble so he left making threats saying I would regret this. Although I received the phone, all my pictures of Mojo was deleted from my phone. Later figuring out, step mom deleted those pictures to erase my will to live and apparently she was the one who suggested of getting rid of him because she hated him out of spite. Step sister, the one who gave me advice to be who I am and live as myself, slowly followed her mother's footsteps lying about what goes on and their whereabouts. I figured this out through the help of my mom, years later. After abandoned by birth father, step mom, and brothers, I had no where to go so my friends tried to figure out how I could start freshening up and asked about what went on. I explained every detail and they realized the situation saying I made the right decision for the first time in my life.

Thankfully, I found a place I could stay temporarily. I made a handful of friends and they taught me many things about myself and things I never knew. I was slowly becoming weaker due to stress and overusing my body for who knows how long that my muscles were tearing. I went to the emergency room (ER) a couple times warned about my health. It was either I die from my heart stopping caused by the neural shock of my muscles tearing or a coma that I can never wake up from. The only other chance was me becoming completely paralyzed. At first I laughed as if the doctor were joking, he was the most serious and concerned so I followed his advice in pacing myself and getting rest when I can. At this point and forever I am a trans girl, I was r4p3d once and sexually assaulted 3 times. People would try to lure me into their vehicles at night when I am struggling to walk from the hospital. I was sometimes misunderstood for my gender and I cry about it. However, the nice friends I make and meet at the shelter gave me food when I would starve or have nothing or give me clothes. I still remember their names and faces. I hope I can continue to remember in the future. It was two years later (2017) and I already filed a medical withdrawal from school in 2015. I was barely surviving every day but I stayed at a different shelter with a kind trans lady always looking out for me and teaching me new things everyday. Suddenly, birth father contacted me making the same demands years ago while offering a house and money. My friend was listening and advised me to see if he was really about caring for my well-being by asking him to come here, the phone mic was muted when we spoke. She was right and so I told him just that. He refused with uncertainty realizing I won't fall for the same trick twice and hung up. It was a few days later my mother called. I barely recognized her voice and told her what went on. After discussing with my friend if she was trustworthy, we tried the same approach and she was more than willing to come. Not only that but she still came the same day as it got dark outside. The shelter was in the center of North Philadelphia which is a very dangerous area with gangs and police patrolling. I told her not to come at night because of how dangerous it is but she still came safely. I went with her surprised with all my belongings.

Things were rough at first between me and my mom. We did not understand each other very well and she disliked how I was transitioning. She said would not mind if I only cross-dressed but that would not make me a woman. I was also aware that HRT does not support full transitions either but I was more into taking that risk than growing up as a guy. It has been 3 years since my mother and I reconnected. She protects me with her life and I now understand everything that has happened even before I was born from the stories I listen into from my mother and her relatives. Before I could trust them, I would eavesdrop on their conversations and realize the actual situation slowly unwrap in my mind. With my abilities, I use them now to improve my abilities in practical and theoretical areas. I returned to college in 2018 after my failed SRS. But I learned how to be immune to suicide and more about how I work. I still get depressed but my heart was always the same by burning with passion, kindness, and excitement. I try to share everything I know with others and help them too. The world is a slightly darker place without you, whoever you are so don't take away your life so lightly. That is one truth of this world. I cannot lie because I am terrible at that and no reason to lie about anything so I tell you something from the truth of my heart. No matter what we're capable of or what we go through, the hardest thing to do in life is help someone and yourself. I'm not sure why people take the easy way because it does nothing for the future because all you're learning is how to take. So, try learning the hardest thing possible. Learning how to give and understand people beyond yourself. Never do it with satisfaction. You're trying to change the world making a better place for everyone not just yourself or others that are like yourself.

Now, I am trying to be the world's- no. The greatest computer and software engineer of all eras. One that no human being can ever match because they have to be me to do so. However, it still brings light to all the skills and potential of humanity to another level, as well as kindness, making what we do today like child's play. For right now, I am going to college and trying to work at Grey Haven as an employee, intern or even the president to bring Spiral Knights to another level. I don't want Spiral Knights to die. It's where I met friends, learned a lot about life, and gave me knowledge that changed my fate. I already sent emails about my resume to many addresses so far. Hopefully, someone reply and allow that opportunity. As for everyone reading this, I want you stay safe and realize your true potential. Not full, I meant true potential. We're humans. One of the most flawed, stupid, loving, emotional beings in existence but it's where our flaws really enhances our potential to reach beyond time and space itself. If I do become a part of Spiral Knights development or even the president of the team. I really hope I bring it to another potential where it thrives generations after this era. That would be something interesting to see in the future, don't ya think so~?

With Love to Everyone and Especially You, Noon <3,
~Xspiral-Ace (Avina, the heart of Nightmares)