Alright, so here is the timeline:

1 minute from now: Game begins to update

2 minutes from now: Nick drinks a cup of iced tea, having a nice day

4 minutes from now: Earthquake strikes OOOs headquarters

6 minutes from now: Bopp is choked to death by an escaped gorilla, leaving no one to write honest responses to new players or warn us of the dangers of psychology.

8 minutes from now: Everyone at OOO is dead, the servers destroyed and because of the updating process, the game is lost

11 minutes from now: A second and third earthquake destroy large portions of the infrastructure that support the internet, as well as key major cities

13 minutes from now: Diablo III comes out again unannounced, stealing 95% of the playerbase instantly

15 minutes from now: Sega declares the game officially dead

Only Black Jesus can save us now!