Good news! Pro Trolls Patrol, the premiere guild for being nice and gentle with the sensitive feelings of other players, is not accepting any new applicants!

Hypothetically, if we were looking for new members, and hypothetically, if we had criteria for said new members, they would hypothetically be as follows:

Applicants:
- Must have all 6 star gear
- Must be able to speak (not type) fluent Portuguese
- Must have physical proof that they have never cried in their life, as well as 3 eyewitness testimonies from elected officials
- Must have mastery of broken english, i.e. "how u get da sord n da sheld cn i hav crnwns bzt jris ???? ?????"
- Must not play Spiral Knights

- Cannot use MacBook unless it is made by Apple
- Cannot play drunk unless it is from alcohol
- Cannot use any weapons or armor
- Cannot have any facial hair or have any pets
- Cannot be Thejokerj*

It's a good thing we're not recruiting right now. If you read all of the conditions above, and ESPECIALLY if you read them more than once for what you hoped would be clarification, then you wasted your time. Let's be honest though, you've got time to kill if you're on here.

For more information on how to apply:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvdf5n-zI14

Please direct any questions, problems, concerns, issues, questions, complaints, scary stories, questions, and questions to Thejokerj in game, who will kindly listen, pay attention, and then be absolutely unbearable and socially unacceptable as per usual.

Thanks for reading, and remember, we really really really like you and care what you have to say.

*If you are Thejokerj, you are more than welcome to quit your current excuse for a guild, and then whine super hard and get mad all over the place when you don't get invited to the Patrol or any other real guild. No one can stand you. Please stop playing forever.