1...Royal jelly/armor shield had twice as much piercing defense and half as much normal defense, with a touch more health?
2...Dread skelly/armor shield had twice as much shadow defense and half as much normal defense, with a touch more health?
3...Plate armor had no negative attributes to weapons/movement?
4...Sudaruska/Triglav did equivalant damage on neutral targets when compared to to gran faust/divine avenger, and swung just as fast?
5...Barbarous thorn shield was stripped of its piercing resistance?
6...Divine avenger's charge attack did not stick to walls?
7...Gran faust's charge attack did not stick to walls+took the same amount of time to charge as faust?
8...Big Angry Bomb had a larger radius, and a chance to deal stun?
9...If the stun that stagger storm dealt was "fixed" to not make things attack twice?
10...There was a haze bomb that dealt sleep?
11...There was a point damage bomb similar in charge and detonation to radiant sun shards with a very small radius that dealt about 500ish normal damage?
12...There was a curse haze bomb that only cursed things for 1/2 a second, so that they had to be in the radius to be cursed?
13...Cautery sword had life steal?
14...There was an upgrade to swiftstrike buckler that halved its health and defenses for one more level of ASI?
15...Dark Briar Barrage did not flinch beasts as easily?
I'm also interested if you already use these (provided they exist), and what you think of them.
Notes:
10: Keep in mind that poison+sleep = no movement+not healing, and not no movement + constant damage from sleep.
12: The 'curse status' would wear off in 1/2 of a second, meaning that players in lockdown could effectively fly through it and continue to attacking as if nothing had happened. On top of that, they would still retain their ability to attack when cursed but at the cost of their own health.
13: The "life steal" mechanic on the cautery sword is made so that it forces enemies to drop extra hearts when they are killed the first time, and only if a fair portion of the damage done to it is dealt with the cautery sword.... lets say a lumber has a "cautery value" (based on the number of drops it is likely to give) of 1 big red heart- if you deal 1/4 - 1/2 the damage to it will drop 1/2 of a big red heart.
This means that no revived gremlins/zombies will drop hearts, and damaging the enemy with another weapon+finishing him is not going to get you any more hearts- you'd actually have to use the sword.
As has already been explained to you in a couple of threads, many people use Divine Avenger and Gran Faust as it is. In particular, the sticking-to-walls behavior, that seems to bewilder you so thoroughly, is not really much of an issue.
But it's true that I rarely use Gran Faust's charge attack, because it's so slow. If it were faster (say, as fast as DA's), then I would use it more.