(A Diary Styled Fanfic about a new knight in the Spiral Knights training)
Day 1: Beginning the mission
I joined this program called Spiral Knights training, They gave me armor and a weapon. I have no idea why i need it, but i want to be a spiral knight!
1:00 PM, 2 hours later
We crash landed on a strange planet, they warned me not to go to haven alone. I made a new friend, her name is Javanganza.
1:05 PM, 5 minutes later.
Why do these knights have all these strange names? I met a female knight named Rhonda, i think I'm in love.
2:00 PM, 55 minutes later.
Im stuck in the clockworks, Javanganza left me, Im stuck fighting off these monsters. Help!!!
(Comment and Reply if you want more of the diary)
This seems to be a good object-lesson about first-person writing. Realistic-looking diaries aren't particularly interesting to look at, as they simply contain summaries of information, rather than minute details about every feeling and intermediate action that ever crossed your mind.
The story might be better-served if the character is looking back on his/her adventure and is remembering in great detail (or with artistic liberties) what happened.