So to start out I work with disabled people, and one of them at work the other day flat out told me he picked on me in particular because I didn't do anything back and I was like "dog I'm nice to you, why would you do that??? I don't have to be nice.." and he basically just saw it as weakness which is definitely something I must correct- having respect is kind of necessary in my job- and so I told him about how as a child I was kind of violent, beat up the other kids, and well I didn't have many friends and as a teen I sort of grew out of it and became a very gentle person but the more I think about it the more I really see that people just take advantage regardless of whether they have the mind of a child or are game masters or housing etc like the other day I come home, do my "cleaning check" which is every week because this guy I lived with told the office on us that we were "dirty" even though he made messes more than us and now they're like bullying us for money so I can't even eat without asking friends for help and guess what???

"Weapon Balence"

As if they typo'd it but no, this is their way of saying they read what I've written and don't care because it was me writing it and that they basically just don't want me even though I put money into their game and you know it really adds to my depression and they know I have it and even though I'm on meds and have gone through rehab+ it's a daily struggle that I'm not allowed to talk about it because it's like some kind of terrible taboo...... when you call the cops they send you to the hospital and it takes forever and is boring you know what you learn??? that there are worse things than death and one of them is being so bored that you read McFarlane's Perfect Bride and have everything you care about taken away from you and that there really isn't anything people can do and further that no one, the GMs, the client, the housing apartment, my old room mate, cares unless you're about to pass away or something and then they keep you on life support.

But yea should I craft another combuster to ease my pain? I don't even like combuster and I already have three (two are reskins) but maybe I will feel something? Is there a better weapon to ease the pain of living? Skepticraven could perhaps describe the emotional state caused by crafting the gunner armors?