"What a day this will be," I thought as the everyday flow of visitors went through the town. Oh wait, I haven't introduced myself. I'm...well, I forgot my name. It's been a looooooong time since I've seen anyone I know. Well, the one thing I do know is that I'm dead. What a surprise! You see, I used to be part of a great tribe. We had recently taken down our most dangerous enemy tribe, and we were studying their magic and research to push our tribe further up the ranks. We quickly started mastering their magic skills and set to work.
Dark magic was discovered not long afterwards. Those who used it became addicted to it, more and more, until it looked as if their entire life depended on performing dark magic. However, to prevent the spread of this addiction, our leaders banned any performance of dark magic, and any one caught would be exiled. Me and my best friend, let's call him D.C., had found an abandoned mansion. Well, we thought it was abandoned, atleast. One day, me and D.C. decided to try a little bit of dark magic, try and ressurect a chromalisk. We carved a ritual circle in the ground, and D.C. went off to keep lookout.
Ritual execution was a tricky thing...but that didn't matter, for one hundred miles away another of my tribe was concocting a dark ritual to end all dark rituals. He was almost finished...and then he said the words, and a wave of energy blasted out, decimating every living thing in the area, including me and D.C. However, the dark energy messing up my dark ritual had unforeseen consequences...me and D.C. were turned into ghosts, just like everyone else in our tribe, but me and D.C. were anchored to our places, and my skeleton flew backwards into the ritual circle, messing up the ritual even more. The disrupted ritual shrank me, and removed my speech, but worst of all, it doomed me to only be able to speak, in order, the first words of these paragraphs!
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Feedback plz kthnxbai
Its alright, you didn't give us much to work with. Its like just about every other introductory chapter, where you haven't a clue whats really going on. It was good enough to warrant reading, if thats what you're asking for but still a bit obscure it some places. SO my point is, as a standalone its bleh but it could definitely be built up upon.