Spiral Knights - Phantom Tracks(On the 3rd part)

Phantom Tracks(On the 3rd part)

21 replies [Last post]

Sun, 11/27/2011 - 15:21

Autofire

The second part is on the 8th post.
The third part is on the 15th post.

I made this story a while ago for school. That's why I describe things that most of you would already know. My assignment was to write an eerie story with mood changes.

For some reason, I just can't seem to get the spelling errors out of my own works, but I can pick them up easily with other people's works. :P So, assuming this is true with other people, please report any errors. I'm heading for a top notch story. :3

Well, enjoy. :)

It was dim, as always, where the two of us stood. It was November first, the day after Halloween. My friend, whose name was Iron Ice, and I stood on a platform inside Moorcroft Manor, an old mansion used as an inn for traveling ghosts. To our left were barely invisible train tracks, which seemed to be suspended on nothing.

As I said, we were standing together. We were talking about swordplay techniques. As we talked, we munched on some of the candy given to us during the Halloween festival. We had been talking for a while, when Iron Ice suddenly said he heard something. A moment later I asked him, "Are you sure it wasn't just your imagination? I didn't hear anything." He said it probably was, and we started conversing some more. A few moments later, however, there was another rumble. We both heard, and felt it this time. He stayed there, in case he heard anything else, as I went to go ask the receptionist ghost (who was quite friendly) if he knew what the rumble was. He told me that he wasn't aware of it, and that he didn't know anything about it.

When I got back, Iron Ice was not there. I looked around, perplexed. I looked at the radar on my wrist screen, which was designed to help find other knights in the area. It said he was right behind me. I looked over my shoulder, but there was no one there. I looked at the screen a second time. This time, it said that he was several feet ahead of me. I walked forward, but he wasn't there either. I looked at the screen again. It said there was no one in the area. I frowned. Something wasn't right. I looked around. I looked in the direction of the train tracks. Then down the platform, lit by only a few pale blue lamp posts.

When I looked back at the tracks, I was startled at what I saw. There was a passenger train, which looked like it had just pulled in, but it didn't make a sound. The smoke that was coming out of the smoke stack was a pale green. I glanced at the radar again. It said that Iron Ice was in there. After a moment of thought, I made up my mind to take a look in the train.

I climbed into the second to last car of the train. The first thing I noticed was how piercing cold it felt inside the train, even though I was wearing thermal armor. The next thing I noticed was that all of the seats with red velvet cushions were empty.

I decided to go ask the receptionist if he knew about a train that was supposed to stop here. I almost got out the train car, but then I stopped. I was miles above the floor! I nearly fell, but I grabbed the doorway and caught myself. I pulled myself back into the car and stumbled backwards till I hit the wall behind me. I sat there for several minutes. I then crept back towards the doorway, and looked out. I realized that the train was going forward quickly over the barely visible tracks. I looked in the direction opposite the one that the train was traveling. Moorcroft Manor was far behind. Then I looked in the direction that the train was traveling. The ghostly tracks seemed to go on forever.

I realized that if I could get up to the engine of the train, which was few cars ahead, that I might be able to get the train to move backwards. I started walking down the hallway towards the door. As I was walking, I hit my head on something. I quickly stepped back. When I looked around, there was nothing there. Then I felt around where the object was that I had hit my head on, and felt the object there. This confused me.

While I was thinking, I blinked. While I blinked, I saw a green flash. This confused me even more. I shut my eyes, to see what would happen. I saw a skull that glowed bright green! I opened my eyes with a jump, and the skull vanished. I guessed that I could only see the skull with my eyes shut. So I closed my eyes again, and it reappeared. This proved my guess. I noticed that the skull was attached to the ceiling with a cord. Then something caught my eye. Something was sitting in the seat that I was standing by. I looked closer, and realized it was a skeleton! There was another sitting by it. Then I gave a look around. All of the seats were filled with skeletons. I couldn't see the seats, or any of the other things I would normally see, but I saw the skeletons. Some wore armor that looked like the armor that my fellow spiral knights would wear. The sight of this put chills inside me. I opened my eyes, and it all vanished. I was back in the empty train car, all alone.

I started down the hallway again, ducking to make sure I wouldn't hit any more of the skulls suspended on the ceiling. When I finally reached the door, I found that it was locked. I looked around for a key. When I didn't find any, I realized that the key might be invisible like the bones that I had just passed by. I closed my eyes, but I didn't see any key. What I did find, however, was a glowing sphere on the wall. I opened my eyes, and saw a panel on the wall. There were odd symbols on it. One of the symbols to the left looked like an eye. I thought it looked familiar. The center of the eye's pupil was where the sphere was, so I lightly touched that part of it. The moment I touched it, I felt cold all over, inside and out. I moved my hand away, but the cold feeling lingered.

Then the strangest thing happened. The symbols started to change, right before my eyes. When they finished changing, I could easily read them. They read, "The hidden bones, only to be seen by the dreamer's eye, have awoken."

As I was thinking about what the message meant, a cold, bony hand touched my shoulder. I whirled around. All the skeletons, the ones that I had seen only with my eyes shut, were now clearly visible. They were also standing. The one that had touched me was standing in front of me. All of the zombies were blankly staring at me. Then the one closest to me asked in a trembling voice, "Would you like to sit with us?" He gave an odd gesture towards an empty seat as he said this. I was too frightened to say anything. My past experiences with walking skeletons had not been enjoyable. I drew my sword, ready to fight for my life. The one in the front raised his hand, in preparation to strike.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Sadly, I had to end it here. It was getting long, and I was busy after I got done with this part. I'll write more as soon as I get around to it, though.
Note that I will not accept more characters yet.

I would have posted this much sooner,(I wrote it almost 2 weeks ago.) but I've been so busy that I got around to it now.

Sun, 11/27/2011 - 16:30

Valorai

Awesome! This has to be one

Awesome! This has to be one of the best chapters I've ever read! Really! I really think you should write more, this story is great!!!

Sun, 11/27/2011 - 17:16

Duskfinder

lol what did your teacher say ?

This is great!

Sun, 11/27/2011 - 18:24

Autofire

She liked it a lot, but she

She liked it a lot, but she gave me an -A because there were some spelling errors and such. I think I got most of them sorted out now, however. And don't worry, I'll write more. I would have put this up on Thanks Giving and then written more, but I came down with a stupid cold. >_>

Sun, 11/27/2011 - 18:47

Psychodestroyer

COOL

COOL STORY BRO :D

Sequel anytime soon?

Mon, 11/28/2011 - 14:33

Valorai

Wed, 12/07/2011 - 14:08

Autofire

Thanks, everyone. :DI'll try

Thanks, everyone. :D

I'll try to make more soon....(Let's hope that's not in valve time.)

I only get a short chance to get on to post these things, btw.

EDIT: I'll work on it more today! I might even finish the next part. :)

Tue, 11/29/2011 - 09:34

Johnnjlee

nice

this has got to be the best thing i have ever read on the forums

Sun, 01/01/2012 - 11:44

Autofire

Part 2! YAY! :D

Part 2! YAY! :D Sorry for taking so long. It's not as long as the previous part, but I hope you guys like it.

I swung my blade in a flash. The zombie's forearm was tumbling on the floor. It stared for a moment, than leaped back. It gave a grating screech that made me start to feel strange. Then another skeleton joined in. Then another. And another. Until all of the zombies were screaming in unison. I my knees begin to buckle, seeming to not have the strength to hold me up any more. Numbness quickly came all over my body. My vision began to blur. I could hear my sword clanking to the ground. I dropped to the floor. Everything was starting to turn dark. The monotonousness screeches of the zombies began to sound quite, and far away.

I tried to stay awake. I knew I had to keep from blacking out. I reached for my holstered gun. I fumbled at the handle for a few agonizing seconds. I finally managed to grip it. Then I pulled it out of its holster and pointed it in the direction of the screaming, and fired. I collapsed. I lay there for several seconds. Everything was quite.

It dawned on me that the howling of the zombies stopped. I picked myself up. The car was caught on fire! There were some charred bones lying on the floor as well. I glanced at my Firo Driver. The dial on it was switched to drain mode, which made it use the energy in my suit rather than its own energy. I groaned. I'd used almost all of it in one shot. I switched it to the normal mode before I used anymore of my suit's energy.

It was very hot in that train car. This made me remember what I was doing before. I tried the door behind me. When I found it was locked, I decided to shoot the lock out. To my dismay, the bullets were bouncing off. At this, I began to ram door in an attempt to break the door down. As the air grew hotter, my charges became quicker and harder. I froze when a croaking voice from behind me said, "How long are you going to keep that up?"

I whirled around. The voice seemed to have come from some were in the blaze. I peered into the fire. I thought I could see a slight outline in of a person in the fire. "Who are you?" I shouted.

The speaker was silent for a moment. Then he said,"The way I see it, you have three options. One, you keep trying to bash that door down until you burn the ashes." He paused, then continued, "Two, you jump out a window and fall to your death. And three...," he stopped.

I could hear nothing but the crackling of the fire. I said, “And?” in an attempt to make him keep talking.

He finally said, almost in a whisper, "you can sleep...with me and my friends..."

At this, I began banging on the door harder than I had previously. The fire crept closer. It had almost engulfed the whole interior of the car. I kept on doing this till I was tired out. I leaned against the door, panting. "What is this thing made of?" I uttered under my breath. "It seems rusty, but I can’t get it to open." I heard a small, weak chuckle that put chills up my spine.

I thought I heard something behind the door. I put my ear to it, but heard nothing. Then the door suddenly came down! I tumbled out onto the other side. I was in a dark room. As I started to get up, something suddenly came on top of me! I tried fighting it off, but I got a hard hit on the head. I blacked out.

To be continued...

...again...

EDIT: originally it was "Too bee continued..." This was supposed to make the "to" and the "be" seem stretched, but I guess that just looks like a spelling error. :P

Sat, 12/10/2011 - 14:23

Tuhui

Nice story.

Sat, 12/10/2011 - 16:12

#10

Valorai

YAY

AWESOME!

Fri, 12/23/2011 - 05:57

#11

Tuhui

BUMP

I'm not gonna let this thread die.

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 08:20

#12

Autofire

bumpidy bumb

I'm working on the 3rd part. It should be out before next week.

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 19:17

#13

Tuhui

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 20:52

#14

Doomskull

Nice story and an A-???

I personally would give it an A+, but why all the spelling errors?

Sun, 01/01/2012 - 11:46

#15

Autofire

Part 3

Ok, here is part 3. (Thanks to Heavy-Duty on coming up with the names.)

"This stuff tastes so good!" That's what I heard as I slowly started to come back to my senses. I heard crunching as well. I was in a cramped, box-shaped room, illuminated by two red, glowing stones. I realized these must be torch stones. There were various tools propped up against the corners of the room. In the far corner to my left, there was a stack of crates. On the walls to the left and right of where I lay, there were two doors. At the opposite side of the room, I saw two silhouettes. One of them was sitting against the wall, while the other was standing against it. The munching came from their direction.

My head throbbing, I asked, "Where am I?" The sounds of eating stopped. One of them, the one that was standing against the wall, came toward me. When he came into the light, I saw he was a gremlin. He was tall for a gremlin, and his armor had green and brown lines along it. He seemed to be looking me over.

When he seemed satisfied, he answered in a single breath, "You're in a small box car at the end of a train."

I replied, "End of the train? I thought this was the third from last car."

"It was, until you, I guess, caught the other one of fire. We managed to disconnect it to keep this one from catching fire."

After some silence, I asked, "Was it you who opened the door?"

He nodded, "I had reinforced it before to keep anything from coming out of it. I can't deal with zombies all the time. The pounding made me suspicious," he explained, "then when I heard you talk, I knew something more intelligent was in there."

"What made me black out?"

The gremlin chuckled, "I did that."

I stared.

"I can't have you causing any problems," he said nonchalantly.

"Problems?" I replied, my voice beginning to tense. I tried to get up, but something stopped me at the waist. I found that there was a rusty, metal ring around my waist that was chained to the wall. "Hey, what's this for?"

"I just said why," he smirked.

The other figure got up and walked into the light. He was a gremlin also. He was average size for a gremlin, having a suit that looked like a Gremlin Mender's, but it had some devices attached to it. Around his waist he held an array of tools. "Maybe we should tell him what's going on," he said to the taller one.

My eyes went over to the small box he was holding in one of his hands. It looked like the box of energy rock cubes I had bought the day before, designed to return stamina to whoever ate a few. "Is that why you chained me to the wall?", I questioned, "So you could steal from me!?"

The large gremlin stared while the one holding the box began to stutter, "Uh, I, no, I mean, I didn't-."

I shouted accusingly at him, "Ahah! Thieves!"

The first one leaped over to one of the corners and grabbed a hammer. Then he leaped at me and with an over head swing, he hit me on the head. Even though I was wearing my helmet, I was put in a daze.

"Reckterra, please," the smaller gremlin said to the other, "even if he is going to be killed, the least we could do is make him comfortable."

Reckterra shot him a glare, then he growled, "Whatever made you think of saying that, after all him and his friends have done to us?"

I became alert upon hearing this, "Me!? It was you gremlins who attacked me in first place, and then on they have always-" Reckterra hit me again.

"Shout at me again, and I'll hit you without the helmet," he barked.

When my head stopped pounding so hard, I asked, "Who, or what, is going to kill me then?"

After a moment, Reckterra quietly said, "Scrinmile, you tell him," and he receded into the shadows.

Scrinmile leaned against one of the doors. He sighed, then explained, "In the next car down lives something that was supposed to be a myth: the Vog Cub. I'm not sure why, but it only feeds on living things. When we found out about it, we attempted to slay it. When it overpowered us, we both thought it would eat us, but instead it made a deal with us. The deal was-"

I couldn't help but to interrupt him, "It made a deal with you?"

The gremlin nodded, "Yes, it is quite intelligent for a wolf. It can speak in the same language you normally speak in." He cleared his throat, then went on, "The deal was that we would feed it anything living that wonders onto the train."

"So, in short, you guys give up other's lives so you can keep your own." I put in, "Sounds rather single sided to me."

Scrinmile looked down and sighed, "I know, but I didn't have much choice. Reck said yes to it as soon as the offer was made."

After a long pause, I asked, "Was there anyone else that you did in before I came here?"

"Yes, just one. We just handed him over a few minutes before you got here."

I tensed, "Was he a knight wearing the standard cobalt gear?" Scrinmile shrugged.

Reck suddenly put in, "Yes, he was. Do you know him?"

I gasped in disbelieve, "That must have been Iron-Ice!"

Sun, 01/01/2012 - 14:41

#16

Heavy-Duty

...

I guess now we know why that Train won't come back. Thanks for catching it on fire. And to top of all this chaos for your Spiral-Knight, you have to end up taking on a Vog Cub? AND save your friend, AND get away from those Zombie Passengers, AND find out what to do with the gremlins, AND get to your destination? Conclusion: Do NOT take trains from Moorcroft. The service is just as terrible as it is in the lobby.

Sun, 01/01/2012 - 18:32

#17

Autofire

Lol, that's what I went when

Lol, that's what I went when I read your post. :P

Who says I will take on a Vog Cub?
Or who says I do what to do with the gremlins?
Or Or who says I will save Iron?
Or Or OR who says it will end up with a happy ending?

Your conclusion is right, but the moral of this story(erm, this post right here) is: don't assume, a lot may happen. :P

(By the way, Iron-Ice is a real player. Met him in the game while I was looking for someone to take part in my story.)

Sun, 01/01/2012 - 19:17

#18

Heavy-Duty

...

If you want any more name inspirations just let me know ;D
So you're gonna take on a Skolver and completely forget about those Gremlins, while facing and killing Iron Ice, and it turns out he's the conductor so the train will crash and you all die? Or will Nick come out of nowhere to tell you and Iron that you can't be on the train without Tickets? xD

Thu, 01/05/2012 - 22:16

#19

Autofire

(;

You are in for a big surprise! :D

BTW, this is from the view of my knight. All I'm doing is writing to story, but it is supposed to be the knight's(or in this case, AutoFire's) point of view.

EDIT: That tickets thing does give me an idea, though... thanks again! :] I might send you a friend request. :)

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 09:55

#20

Icilan

What a marvelous story this is.

Lot's of parts take in the place. Also you take some Spiral Bench items in your story. Decent indeed. But I'm always so curious what's next now?! Had to end what I'm saying right now._.

But that setting took in place of what you have metal ring in place near of your waist. I remember in the mission's Prestige information to donate items for Prestige; That info's subject was about Gremlins abusing and hurting captivated knights and another knight need you knights to help donate weapons and gear to help stop it. That's all I'm saying.

Keep it the exceptional work, Autofire. REALLY fascinating.

Tue, 05/29/2012 - 10:09

#21

Tuhui

Brining back unfinnished

Brining back unfinnished things from the dead only brings sadness if it will never be compleated. I don't know that he won't post again but i don't think he will so this will only bring me pain, i hope he will but i know that probably happen.

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Phantom Tracks(On the 3rd part)