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This game is not as innocent as it seems

14 replies [Last post]
Thu, 03/15/2012 - 02:16
Shoebox's picture
Shoebox

Now I'd like to talk to you all about a very serious problem affecting young knights in this game Spiral Knights.
A problem many people turn a blind eye to, maybe they're just too deep in the stuff to care anymore.

Who knows?

All I know is that this game is sick and depraved and here's why:

Crack, or as the "Strangers" call it, Crystal Energy.

You kids don't realise it but from the very moment you land on Haven you're stuck on the stuff, it only just works it's way out of your system and bam, they throw in a hit for free. Soon enough you can't even operate without it, waiting around to get enough of the 'mist' to get you back in.
Killing "Monsters" in the basement for your "Crystal Energy".

And who's behind all of it? The "Strangers". The same people who sell you the gear you need to get your fix, otherwise you have to sniff the fumes of other people to earn your keep. Their opposition? The" Gremlins", Police who work around the Clock trying to keep Cradle Safe. They work the beat trying to protect their kids and their families and you just waltz right in there and slaughter the lot of them.

Some people have it easy and they just pay Three Rings, the Triads who operate this little drug ring. Forcing innocent snipes to work in their 'Energy Dens', forced to combine volatile 'Minerals' together so you can get buzzed.

Maybe you shouldn't have accepted "Candy" from the strangers. You could have said "No", but you wanted to be cool and get high like your friends.

Now look at you, going crazy over who has control of the stuff, a perpetual drug war that Spiral HQ helps perpetuate.
Maybe they think if they keep pumping you full of drugs you won't realise all the things you're killing are just Rival Gang Members.
Or even just civilians working a horrible job, the people who keep Cradle running at night while you're out scoring your next hit.

Don't even get me started on the "Health Capsules", you walk into the Nightclub, or "Advanced Training Hall" and you think, oh it's okay it's just a health capsule and it pings, then the next thing you know you're setting innocent kids on fire and destroying the furniture. Slashing up your Rival Gang Members and then one drops and your entire group fights over who gets to take it. No wonder you freaks eat the hearts of your opponents.

I bet you think it gives you some kind of power, huh? Maybe you think if you eat their hearts you'll become a God! Who knows what you whacked out freaks think.

All I know is this place isn't nearly as innocent as it seems.

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 02:21
#1
Mastersleet-Alt's picture
Mastersleet-Alt
XD

XD

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 02:44
#2
Venomousbiohazard's picture
Venomousbiohazard
XD

XD

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 03:10
#3
Psaro's picture
Psaro
Trollolol

Insane theory but it fits PERFECTLY O.o, BUY ALL TEH CE AND SHARE NONE WITH LITTLE KIDDIES!!! And the caps? Not much we can do about it :3
And like the rest, xD.
That is all

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 03:10
#4
Damienfoxy's picture
Damienfoxy
That...

That deserves many internet points.

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 03:42
#5
Psaro's picture
Psaro
OVER 9000!!!

OVER 9000!!!

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 04:03
#6
Mirei's picture
Mirei
Wat? http://i1.kym-cdn.com/ph

Wat?

http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/267/172/c47.gif

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 04:31
#7
Njthug's picture
Njthug
This is why Shoebox is a

This is why Shoebox is a legend above all.

As for my problem I use angel dust and cocaine to survive in Sk the crack was just too weak for me.

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 04:33
#8
Xylka-Mkii's picture
Xylka-Mkii
Shoebox, how long have you

Shoebox, how long have you been talking with Nj?

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 05:14
#9
Halandin's picture
Halandin
Just say no!

Just say no!

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 05:16
#10
Mejezfeld's picture
Mejezfeld
haha wow this came up right

haha wow this came up right as I was trying to construct a bong in Spiral-Spy.

...Holy [sudden realization!!!] does this make Kozma a "narco girlfriend"?

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 05:33
#11
Tom-Awsm's picture
Tom-Awsm
...

http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/4145/tyrone20biggums.jpg

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 07:41
#12
Neodasus's picture
Neodasus
+1 to the max

+1 to the max

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 08:24
#13
Maeko's picture
Maeko
/insert Cocaine

/insert Cocaine Bear.jpg

Didn't want to po
st the actual link as a warning not to click does nothing on the internet

Thu, 03/15/2012 - 08:53
#14
Aumir's picture
Aumir
Well, it is time now for all

Well, it is time now for all of us to go on a nice little camp to cure of our addiction of cocaine to Korea. If it works with games, it must work with drugs, of course.
No, it is not because they are bathing in cocaine. It is cocaine, right? RIGHT!?

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