Spiral Knights - The Rumor Mill

The Rumor Mill

36 replies [Last post]

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 16:35

Spookington

Hello SK community,

Because I was both bored and amused at already-present rumors that exist in-game, I thought of a fun game to play: We all start spreading rumors for the Hell of it.

I do not mean to be malicious or to harmfully spread disinformation- i.e., nothing really cruel like "delete system.32 to get infinite crowns" stuff. (For the love of God, do NOT do that: your computer will not work afterward!) - neither does it have to take place outside this thread.

The game works where in at least one post you tell a rumor you yourself have heard, whether you believe it or find it far-fetched, and then make up a completely ridiculous and idiotic one yourself, and as many as you want.

For example:

"Rumor has it that the phantoms in the graveyard levels are actually GMs trolling players"

"If you type /sit at the start of the Vanaduke boss fight, if you survive a few hits he will concede to your form of nonviolent protest and allow you to pass."

Of course, I suck at being funny - so don't take my examples to be templates. Please.

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 16:40

Spookington

To get started:

What I heard:
"Snipes are the true natives of Cradle, and they control the strangers like puppets!"

My own:
Every time somebody says 'FF 1s 0v3rp0wahd!!!111!' in LD, Nick kills a Mewcat...

...and his thirst for the blood of the innocent is insatiable.

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 18:59

Orangeo

"Snipes are the true natives

"Snipes are the true natives of Cradle, and they control the strangers like puppets!"

I have actualy thought of that being a possibility. I mean they say the same thing every time you speak to them, and their voices sound like casset players. Plus their heads are the size of snipes, and the robes make an easy disguise.

Also, in a way your examples were funny just due to the fact that they were bad. No offense intended.

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 19:23

You-Mad-Bruh

You guys probably already

You guys probably already heard this circulating around, but whatever, I guess its still remotely worth mentioning:

Sometime last week, Chris and Rubyeclipse were alone on an empty haven. After several minutes of heated discussion on why they broke up their e-relationship some months ago, Rubyeclipse abruptly softened up and wanted to make amends with Chris. Chris likewise softened up, and accepted Ruby's tearful apology. That was when they walked over, hand-in-hand, to the garden where they did...something.

We cannot be entirely sure if there is truth in this because it was heard from a friend, who heard it from his friend who was informed by his girlfriend about what she heard from guildies. Either way, it definitely sounds believable to me...

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 20:25

Toxicblade

Derp

Rumor is that if you manage to solo Darkfire Vanaduke with proto weapons and armor in under ten minutes without taking a hit, and with no trinkets, you will get one million crowns.

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 20:29

Xairathan

Rumor has it that those little protruding blocks in Haven? Those ones with spirals on them? THEY'RE MINES!

They're set up by some unknown force so that one day when the Swarm takes over, they'll detonate ALL of them and kill us ALL!

THEY'RE EVERYWHEREEEEEEEEE!

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 21:02

Princeberton

Live long and prosper

The ghost of Nick's dead brother stalks the clockworks under the name Herobrine

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 21:06

Doctorspacebar

SUNSHAAAAAAAAARDS

Feron is conspiring with the Gremlins to get us off Cradle!

Final Flourishes are made out of snipes' bones and have enough radioactive content to make their wielder slowly die a horrible death!

Sat, 07/14/2012 - 23:42

Adderone

Punch is secretly using the

Punch is secretly using the crowns from his UV service to contribute to funding for King Tinkinzar's gremlin war machines!

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:07

Spookington

If you use the Gran Faust to

@Orangeo: None taken, my intent was to get the ball rolling for much funnier and creative people.

If you use the Gran Faust to commit suicide over the dark ritual site in Moorcraft Manor while in full Skelly gear, you will be resurrected as a zombie!

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:15

#10

Spiral-Spy

@Toxicblade "Rumor is that if

@Toxicblade
"Rumor is that if you manage to solo Darkfire Vanaduke with proto weapons and armor in under ten minutes without taking a hit, and with no trinkets, you will get one million crowns."

Curiously, there is actually code for something like this, but the no spoiler policy prevents me from going into the details.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:21

#11

Korakc

Kozma killed Boost.

@Spiral-Spy

Hey, are you back or just popping in? I thought you left :P

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:23

#12

Sirhoris

did you know if you find a GM

did you know if you find a GM KILL HIM he will beg for mercy and give you 101001010101010 mil k and ce
but dont do this to eurydice or the GM GIRLS OR THEY WILL KICK YOUR @@@ TO THE CRUB

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:24

#13

Pokenuevo

Razwog is King Tinkinzar's stupid son.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:27

#14

Rangerwillxx-Xx

...

I'm the real Rangerwill, don't let anyone else tell you otherwise.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 08:28

#15

The-Rawrcake

There is a rumor that

There is a rumor that Tersakoff's fashion contest went horribly. I wasn't there, though.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 09:07

#16

Orangeo

"e-relationship "It's

"e-relationship "
It's already a hillarious joke!!!!

"Final Flourishes are made out of snipes' bones "
NOOOO

"and have enough radioactive content to make their wielder slowly die a horrible death!"
YESSSS

"I'm the real Rangerwill, don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."
No! You're Hector-Uribe!

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 13:42

#17

Spookington

Monomi is actually the

Monomi is actually the completed stage of the Roarmulus Twins project - the Twins you fought were just defective prototypes - THE INVASION OF HAVEN HAS ALREADY BEGUN!

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 14:14

#18

Mingthegamer

Did you know? 50 Gremlins are

Did you know? 50 Gremlins are kicked out everyday from King Tinkinzar's HQ.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 16:37

#19

Doctorspacebar

SUNSHAAAAAAAAARDS

Hector-Uribe isn't actually Hector Uribe. Rather, he's this Hector, is very disgruntled at not being included in Brawl (not even a Trophy, just a puny STICKER), and is gathering knights to lay siege to Nintendo's main building until they make a Smash Bros. game with him in it.

Sun, 07/15/2012 - 17:17

#20

Kitty-Softpaws

Reminds me of that time when

Reminds me of that time when Lex Luthor figured out Flash's identity.

Sat, 07/28/2012 - 15:12

#21

Doctorspacebar

SUNSHAAAAAAAAARDS

Adding on that, the reason Hector's here on Cradle is because he doesn't have NEARLY enough weapons for a full-out siege on Nintendo. Armads is, what, 30 uses? 40? He wants to keep it intact for FE6, too- wouldn't do for it to break before then! Or troops, for that matter, since they already went their separate ways... Hector figures Mecha Knights should do the trick. Just has to run OCH enough times to get about 1000 of them...

(Doctor Spacebar used the Max Revive!)

Wed, 08/01/2012 - 04:01

#22

Oroseira

...what.

I heard if you do a /poke on Nick, he will spaz all over the place and explode. Into a fireball.

I also heard if you are about to get hit by Vana's mace, MOTHMAN appears. (not batman char, REAL LIFE CRYTPID OH NO 666)

Wed, 08/01/2012 - 05:51

#23

Aureate

Processing Thoughts of You Always

Rumour has it that the Crowbar actually has a super secret drop location that can only be found when one has completed Darkfire Vanaduke in Proto Gear, with no shield. If one uses the Wishbone in the Sanctuary after Unknown Passage, the Crowbar will appear in place of the standard Maiden's Tear. When one picks up the holy Crowbar in the Sanctuary, they will find themselves transformed and bathed in a light violet aura whilst cherubs sing of the coming of new GMs. At this point, GM Eurydice will appear and whack you around the skull with it, thereby deleting your account.

Wed, 08/01/2012 - 12:55

#24

Tersakaff

Aureate, that was the most entertaining little story I've read today. xD

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 01:36

#25

Naru-Narusegawa

Rumor has it that all the SK GM's have exclusive access to player's gameplay.
They hide amongst the shadows, watching, waiting, reading.
The most shocking series of events is when they gain knowledge of all the richest players in the game.
Amongst those are the ones that just started, or spend money on CE like there is no tommorow.
Therefore , the GM's gather behind the counter at the auction house, where they can inflict serious problems on you.
For instance, Upon them Knowing the fact that you just acquired a vast quantity of CE, the controls are activated, and as you struggle thru the Levels, players experience everything from lagg, sudden disconnects, 1-hit kills, etc. All the while , the GM'S find utter amuzement, as players time And time again continue to rage at the game.
It's a vicious never ending cycle. :D

( LOL.. this really doesn't happen. Does it???)

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 02:35

#26

Evilnut

A snipe is not a single

A snipe is not a single creature... it is in fact three creatures in a symbiotic relationship. The main snipe body seeks out two wing creatures, and generates a magnetic field to hold them close.

That's how snipes get to spin their wings in full circles, and that's why there are snipes that never fly - because they haven't found their wings yet.

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 07:24

#27

Kamen-Rider-Faiz

don't eat the creatures

rumor has it the following creatures can be eaten just would stick to hearts its healthier. here is what i heard.:

Jelly monsters: they taste super sweet but also like the ground they roll on it will give you nightmares man i have seen thing i would suggest it. same goes for lichen and royal

Snipes: they taste like chicken but will attack you like the chickens in Legend of Zelda game if you try to attack them, in other words get ready to fight a lot of snipe and i mean a lot.

Spookat:they taste like pillows of old stale cotton candy only problem make sure to watch your back when trying usually lot of them hanging around. warning do not try with pepperkat you will burn your mouth, and bloogato will freeze it shut, not even going to explain what happens with statikat, also hurkat just stay away from it will make you sick.

creep cake: very tasty comes in a rainbow of flavor just be sure to eat it before it eats you.

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 09:25

#28

Videobun

I heard that if you stay in a

I heard that if you stay in a T3 graveyard with standard Skelly gear for long enough, you actually have a chance to get the the original Zombie looking mask.

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 16:30

#29

Hmmnm

You know Compound 42? They're

You know Compound 42?
They're making Compound Over 9000. Also known as DaTrolL.

Fri, 08/03/2012 - 16:39

#30

Hmmnm

You know Compound 42? They're

You know Compound 42?
They're making Compound Over 9000. Also known as DaTrolL.

Sat, 08/04/2012 - 07:07

#31

Autofire

He did doulbe posty!

They are going to implement sleeping. WITH A NEW ANIMATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111!!!11!!1!1!

XD Well, check SS er something.

Sat, 08/04/2012 - 07:13

#32

Thunderbog

Rumor has it whereas ye could

Rumor has it whereas ye could get a unlimited costume of Love Puppy Disguise, or a Trojan Head Disguise. It's one of those heart boxes when triggered with a .pip file attachment.

Sat, 08/04/2012 - 14:59

#33

Davjo

asdacdaafafaadaxdddxav

There is a rumor that some Spiral Knights aren't actually knights at all...

my disguise will be revealed... yes, the swarm attacked me but just because my arm is shadowy and is a claws it doesn't mean I'm evil and work for them...

Sun, 03/31/2013 - 10:07

#34

Real-Mata-Nui

I heard...

...that if you necro a thread, GMs and/or devs watch your activity to see if you are a threat to the community. I just wanna know if it's true. :P

Sun, 03/31/2013 - 10:39

#35

Infernoburner

Derpuraptor strikes back

Now this thing is on the first page...
Rumour has it that Arkus's tears and corrupted mind made the first Swarm Seed, afterwhich Tinkinzar got corrupted and ordered gremlins to use the rusty Clockworks Tunnels levels to corrupt monsters except fiend family, because they are the only ones that do the job right in their original forms.

Sun, 03/31/2013 - 10:45

#36

Klipik

Binary-dude has incurred his own rumor

Rumor has it that Tinkizar is not the architect and the wiki is wrong.

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The Rumor Mill