Spiral Knights - Tired of being killed in LD? Teach me how to pro

Tired of being killed in LD? Teach me how to pro

46 replies [Last post]

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:34

Redblades

Tired of all the pros being too pro?
Tired of mean people killing you all day?
I've got a solution!
How to be a pro spammer in LD:
weapons:
Hammer
Voltedge
Sentenza
Polaris
TURN ON AA!!
1. When walking around the map, hold the voltedge charge. if somebody gets near you, let go and combo away!!
2. When somebody catches you off guard, switch to hammer and combo away!! after you kill them, proceed to "hump" their dead bodies to anger them.
3. When you see somebody capping/healing alone, let loose with the sentenza! spam them into a stunlock!
4. when you see a group, unleash the polaris! when they're all shocked, walk up to them and brandish combo them!
Repeat for amazing insults from the LD community.
5. NEVER.. EVER... EVEN ATTEMPT TO CAP!

AFTER EVERY DEATH:
Write /lol, and then put one of the following excuses:
POLARIS!
SPAM
AA
COMBO
NOOB
After every kill:
Hump their body, type /lol and call them noob!

in ADDITION!:
Make nicknames involving NOOB and AA for every person and guild you dislike (or has ever beaten you mercilessly)
E.G. RedblAAdes, RigoNOOB, SnAArkey, AAequitas, SPAMpire, and MORE!

ALSO
EQUIP SKOLVER WITH DARKFANG VERY MAX UV'S
I have a skolver very normal max

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:36

Aureate

+1 homggg best advice ever

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:38

Forumchat

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:43

Canine-Vladmir

oh.

So thats how you become a pro.
Omg Omg Omg Omg Omg
I gonna get me some skillz!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:55

Nitef

i repot u all AA spam nubs

omfggg stoppp AA spam suck is a noob i repot u spmmr AA.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 08:58

Zaffy-Laffy

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 09:03

Paweu

Equip a diaper, It's the best trinket you could ever get.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 09:17

Nexassassin

Nex approves.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 09:23

Burntsouls

You missed something

Always say /lol when you kill someone or when you die. Now you are a real pro.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 09:31

Redblades

@buntsoul

THANK YOU
time to aadd more mind boggling illogical tips :)

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 10:32

#10

Solimando

Help me

I'm a pro tired of being so op, can you help me? That's really annoying too, the life of a pro of the pro is not so easy, you kwow. Everytime the same things again and again : Run, kill, run, kill, cap, run, kil...
Sometimes i feel like a god, i can read the mind of my opponent, i kwow all of his moves, CRAZY. I feel like i'm not a human anymore, i got superpowers, really. So how can i have fun in this game? I love this game, but i can't enjoy totally, that's like a player of the nba playing in a garden with a lot of kids, funny 5sec, but really boring after. That's me the problem? I'm really that good? Or this game is full of noobs? Both i guess.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 09:53

#11

Ndcoten

+1 also, remember - when

also, remember - when you're spamming your guns at people that are capturing a point, make sure to never stand on the capture point yourself!

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 10:37

#12

Laylla

free hugs!

Don't go afk while standing on the capture point.

"YOU nooooooooob? Killing afkin' ppl? YOU NOOOOB! "

This also includes reading/writing mails/tells and buying ce, making a tea, taking your dog for a walk.

Yes, this happens quite often.
Yes, this drives me mad.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 10:50

#13

Wodanct

I'd suggest hitting shift so you turn AA off while you charge voltedge. You can aim it a lot better that way instead of the game being silly and firing where the target is instead of where the target will be.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 11:27

#14

Tin-Foil-Hat

Step 1 Get a Warhammer. Step

Step 1

Get a Warhammer.

Step 2

Go Guardian

Step 3

Kill everything.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 11:55

#15

Zeddy

-All bombers are noobs. Make sure you tell them this so they know their place.
-If your strategy of running straight into Nitronomes is failing, make sure to call out the target on his cheap tactics that are unfair.
-Venom Veiler does no damage to you. /lol at people dropping Venom Veilers and run into the haze without fear.
-You should inform bombers that there's a game for bombers called Blast Network which is sure to satisfy their need for bombing so they should stop playing Lockdown already.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 13:23

#16

Duskfinder

Don't forget teh lagz

If they beat you they have no life/if they lose they're noobs

Don't forget teh lag

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:18

#17

Hariender

Urghhh Geez.

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 16:21

#18

Grantgalitz

LD fixed?

[Fixed] == TF2

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 17:37

#19

Ewwvww

Stuffs

You forgot the part about get a super slime slasher and kill everyone

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:01

#20

Dragneel-Wiki

Well...

@Solimando :

Aww cmon Soli, who ragquitted yesterday?

Was it you?

I guess so.

You aren't a superhuman, I've kicked your *** last time.
.
.
.
With all love <3

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 20:48

#21

Icegill

Boom!

@Zeddy; You've once again proven that you have no idea what you're talking about. VV is probably the most effective bomb in LD.

@Dragneel-Wiki; Soli will hit you 4 times, juggling you. He will then turn around and leave when all of a sudden he turns to you, shoots you with sentenza and spits on you.

@OP; Are you serious?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:20

#22

Zeddy

@Icegill

OP is not being serious and neither was I. Noone knows the power of Venom Veiler in Lockdown as well as I do.

I'm a full-time bomber, by the way. Where was the previous time I proved myself to have no idea what I was talking about?

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:39

#23

Aus-Lagger

Dont forget one more vital

Dont forget one more vital %@!% thing

move closer to america D:<

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:45

#24

Iron-Volvametal

Lockdown: The #1 Rage-Inducing, Broken as dropped iPhones, Testosterone filled, BreedingGroundForMachoMenWhoThinkThemselvesAsGodsWhenTheyOnlyHaveFasterReflexesThanOthersWhoAlsoSpendAnInsaneAmountOfCrownsOnUVsOnTheirEquipmentButEndUpMakingAnotherLoadoutWithoutUVsJustToProveThatUVsDon'tHelpJustToBeCockyAndTotalJerksOnlyToDieSecondsLaterAndBlameItOnTheLagOrFramesPerSecondAndProcedeToCallTheKillerAHomophobicSlur game.

(I would have added a LOT more, but I don't think the GMs would take too lightly of it.)

Mon, 02/18/2013 - 21:47

#25

Mzculet

Spampire...

That is..Er...Well...They do over use Polaris a bit too much.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 03:59

#26

Icegill

Boom!

@Zeddy; Ah ok, my bad.

@Night-Rove; A majority of the LD guilds overuse polaris, no sense in picking one out.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 04:34

#27

Dragneel-Wiki

@Icegill :

How about you keep your eye in the US server, and leave EU players talk about themselves?

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 04:51

#28

Fleet-Miss-Gun

Each time you die, you say

Each time you die, you say "ommgggfffz noobz gezt some skillz"

Also only noobz use WRH, real players use proto sword.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 09:08

#29

Michaelb

node 58425, for the 58,427th time.

I'm a mega-pro with a Wrench Wand :3

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 12:33

#30

Fallconn

FALCON PUNCH!

If you really wanna make someone mad, hit them 3 times with FF and then finish them off with a wrench wand, the reactions are hilarious.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 14:04

#31

Icegill

Boom!

@Dragneel-Wiki; Already done so :o

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 14:22

#32

Burntsouls

Here is the last form of this game:
Call of Knights: Spiral ops
/sarcasm

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 16:38

#33

Xcelestialneon

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 17:03

#34

Mzculet

I wasnt picking on Jempire! D:

@Icegill Yeah a lot of pvp guilds do use Polaris or any of it's line :3
But Jempire often has it out first (or all players always have polaris as there main weapon) Most guild doesn't take out Polaris unless the other team brings it out.

Tue, 02/19/2013 - 19:24

#35

Bert-Banana

@OP

Aa Is Pro

Thu, 02/21/2013 - 13:54

#36

Redblades

@icegill, of course I'm not serious. Maybe some of the things here ARE "newb" friendly and could help them, but this guide is mostly sarcastic, and filled with jokes about "pros" who complain about every single aspect of LD.
@Snarkey, AA is pro. teach me how to pro.
@Night-Rove, not really. when PVP guilds play seriously, they spam polaris at an entrance while capping. Strategy.
@Solimando, not sure if sarcastic or incredibly egotistic...
@Dragneel, You sir, need to be quiet and also take a nap. Somebody's grumpy.

ALSO.
Make sure, when you're fighting someone and you know you will lose.. STOP. Pretend you had a lag spike, or you were "typing" or you clicked out of the screen, perhaps even have the stones to say "I was fappin"

Fri, 02/22/2013 - 12:22

#37

Opod

I should have kept reading...

I should have kept reading... Thought you were giving tips on... Teaching me how to dougie... Sigh.

Thu, 02/28/2013 - 11:09

#38

Sigma-Zero

O.o

Puajajajajajajajaj xD
@Solinoob
seriously...you need to get a life..
all know you use AA... and still you say you are a "pro"...
i know you were a bit braggart ... but you are a GHOST!!!
AA players ..... = poop

Thu, 02/28/2013 - 11:12

#39

Fleet-Miss-Gun

Each time you meet someone like that you should shout, "omg you suk becuz yo insulted me!"

Thu, 02/28/2013 - 13:39

#40

Redblades

@sigma-zero

AA does not matter unless you throw full comboes.
AA slightly redirects your aim within a ~80 degree angle.
Solimando uses Final flourish and Gran faust, who both have a ~180 degree angle swing...
If AA can redirect his hit, then it would've hit WITHOUT AA anyways. (simply math, unless you're stupid)
AA players =/= poop

Thu, 02/28/2013 - 14:04

#41

End-Credits

AA master race

I can confirm, I was AA

Fri, 03/01/2013 - 23:54

#42

Blue-Flood

I hax my alchemers with AA

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 00:16

#43

Mindfreaked

Wow

All this year I was playing blindly

+1 would recommend to everyone else

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 05:08

#44

Dragneel-Wiki

I can see that Mindfreaked is enlightened now...

TESO...
Novus ordo seclorum

What the vog is that Dragneel?!

Try to guess it you silly...

Fades...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 05:38

#45

Korakc

Man, if everyone reccomends

Man, if everyone reccomends it, it must be good! Let's try it! By the way, will AP for Sentenza and Acheron for Voltedge work?
:P

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 06:15

#46

Severage

Wow, I tried this and played so much better.

If only I had OCH to use a Warmaster Rocket Spammer I would turn on AT and be teh bezt playr evar.

Some things you missed to say when you die:

/bored and/or /yawn
nice hacking program noob
LAAG!11!!1

Whenever someone says "Stop QQing, idiot" or somesuch, reply with "i wuz jus trollin"
Then, immediately into the next game, the moment someone says anything along the lines of "Stupid [excuse]", reply with "Stop QQing, noob".

~Sev

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Tired of being killed in LD? Teach me how to pro