Personally I feel it would be a good cake mixer. /cough
Most practical use for those spinning claw things on the Torto shields?
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 04:35
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 07:37
#2
The Cake Isn't a Lie?
Who else noticed the eyes are different from the original aggro Tortodrone?
STAB THINGS!
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 07:39
#3
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 07:53
#4
I have no mouth and I need to scream
I'd rather honestly surf/snowboard on those huge shields.
Heck, the spinning part could run through things since it never stops spinning. But it's nothing but a dream ;-;
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 08:43
#5
You are experiencing a PICNIC ERROR!
It looks like a drill...
If only knights had the sense to stab things with it.
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 10:37
#6
I've never had the opportunity to give it a try, but I've heard the savage tortoise's rotor can chop vegetables at an astounding rate, as well as puree strawberries and churn butter.
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 11:43
#7
BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!
For only 2 Tortodrone shells more you can get the apple corer, salad tosser, electric knife, AND two replacement rotors.
That's right!
All of these amazing attachments AND the two replacement rotors for ONLY two extra Tortodrone shells. You literally cannot find better value in all of the Underworld. But you better hurry, this offer only lasts until the end of the Long Migration. That means its already been over for over a whole month!
But don't worry! You can still place a pre-order that will get shipped to you during the next Long Migration.
So hurry up and Call this number that is along the bottom of the post now to pre-order all this amazing tat that will probably break as soon as you use it. Maybe it will even break before! So call now!
888-ITAKE-ALL-YOCROWNS 888-ITAKE-ALL-YOCROWNS 888-ITAKE-ALL-YOCROWNS 888-ITAKE-ALL-YOCROWNS
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 12:38
#8
It looks like a drill...
If only knights had the sense to stab things with it.
Valiance.
@Fehzor and Ghret: But wait! There's more! Get off your butt and walk two feet towards your cell phone in the next 15 minutes and call us, and we'll even throw in a replica Fiend ID Card*!
The Fiendish ID Card replica is not a substitute for a regular Fiendish ID Card for any uses other than novelty. Actual attempt to use it as a gateway to a horrible realm will not succeed, and will only cause the destruction of the card and your dignity. The replica card's value is convertible to 1/20th of a crown, and may not look like the Fiendish ID Card it is based on. Cʀᴏᴡɴ Sʏᴘʜᴏɴᴇʀs® offers no substitutions for this item, and does not claim any responsibility for any incidents that may occur near Fiendish enforcers or any other entity when showing this replica. Do not carry it when sane, healthy, alive, near others, in space, or in any multidimensional rips in the universe. Failure to comply may result in death of immediate family, reanimation of immediate family, death from immediate family, cancer, heart attacks, mysterious sanity-sapping objects appearing on your doorstep, strange artifacts you may find that have grown from your belly button during the night, and a video of your complete inhuman insanity posted on every social sharing site we can think of. Cʀᴏᴡɴ Sʏᴘʜᴏɴᴇʀs® copyright 2014. Do not duplicate this message for any purpose, either educational, recreational, or for miscellaneous motives.
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 14:15
#9
It's obviously used to help
It's obviously used to help super charge up the dark retribution then after a full charge is thrown almost like a bowling ball that doesn't quite touch the ground while it spirals straight toward the Jelly Green Giant.
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 15:20
#10
You are experiencing a PICNIC ERROR!
It's obviously used to help super charge up the dark retribution then after a full charge is thrown almost like a bowling ball that doesn't quite touch the ground while it spirals straight toward the Jelly Green Giant.
My head exploded after I read this.
Tue, 04/08/2014 - 15:50
#11
Behold, the evil squares shall take over the world!
@Solanastrum But there is even more! We'll even throw in a free Nintentortodrone game. You will be able to train your very own virtual cursed Tortodrone that has been brought back from the dead! Train it to fetch and more. (We are not responsible for any of the following: Explosions, death, explosions that cause death, game suddenly ejecting, game console suddenly ejecting, game system turning into a giant monster that destroys everything, cursed pet Tortodrone suddenly leaping out of game and beating you up, more explosions that cause death, and sudden addiction to playing maracas)
Here's a guide for beginning Tortodrone trainers (well, part of it)
1. How to fetch
In order to fetch, grab a sacrifice (Obtained by demonic rituals) and throw it as far as you can, best results can be found when you throw it at your enemy
2. Take it for walks
Since Tortodrones don't like taking walks, you have to do this by stabbing it and running as far as you can
3. Don't discipline your Tortodrone too much...
...Just trust us on this one
Wed, 04/09/2014 - 00:36
#12
Wed, 04/09/2014 - 10:31
#13
Not that anyone would take this seriously ...
But when I saw it I thought it might be something for plugging into something else. You know how in the original Star Wars R2-D2 would stick something into a socket and start turning it, and he turns off a garbage crusher or something? That's what I thought.
/overthinking
Another hand so we could use 2 weps. hehe. IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN