This had to be said.

That moment when you're playing medic and you see a scout on fire. He's screaming medic and running in circles like that will save him. You try to get your mouse on him and he's just running so fast that you can't place it on him. He dies and says you're a bad medic.
Story of my life.

I see stuff like that in this game too,
a guy tells me to spark when I'm in a mob and can't do anything other than fight (never get mobbed when you only use antiguas and a swiftstrike)
eventually he started swearing and getting angry, including ranting about he's gonna "let everyone know I am an #!/hole" and people are going to kick me as soon as I join any party, blah blah (this guy was a knight elite who joined my t3 elite compound 42 run)

That one guy who swore at you Vohtarak Is really Immature. XD

he said other things that ill probably get banned for even mentioning

You didn't mention his name so you should be fine. And besides, Mystri-something says MUCH worse things and this IS Gremlin Chatter so yeah.

I meant get banned for mentioning what he said, not his name, which I forgot
and new story alert (I was going to fight the tier 2 sputterspark)
soldier rank (not saying the name): ill expect payment at the end of each depth (swear) that will be 1k crowns per floor
me (vanguard): for what?
soldier: for me dragging your (swear) noob (swear) through this mission
me: im a vanguard, I already beat this and im just running it for fun
soldier: ok that will be 5k because u higher ranks are rich
(we start, he's died and has gotten almost no kills)
me: see, im not a noob and I am doing better than you to prove it
soldier: then (swear) rev me (swear) and ill only charge you 1k again
I kick him
soldier: you (swear) (swear) put me back in you (swear)
continues to rant as I beat the level solo
eventually I ignored him when his mindless swearing stopped being funny

That guy was a nub. You probobly should have reported him so he doesn't do that to other people.

"You didn't mention his name so you should be fine. And besides, Mystri-something says MUCH worse things and this IS Gremlin Chatter so yeah."
Hello! Nice to meet you!

Not you silly! Mystigryx/creeperperv was who i was talking about!

I always forget that I can report players
also not only does the RNG ruin me, so does my regular luck (both in game and real life)
I get at least one person like that every day, usually beggars who think im rich due to the accessories and costume I grind for a month or weeks each

Really? Cuz I usually get the silent ones. And then the occasional fun guy that I fun along with as well.
Sorry, I used to get them. Stopped playing about a month ago.

While I don't frequently Medic, it bothers me when people die from fire because they ran away from me, the friendly pyro. And then there are those awkward moments where you're out of ammo for airblasting...

new story
leader of party:"I hate these chroma in treasure vaults
me: they're called kleptolisks
leader: (calls me names, says im mean)(kicks me) (then argues through /tell saying mean things)
once again I forgot to report

Leader of party: "I hate these monsters"
Me: "they are called monsters"
Leader: WTF?
Or
LOP: "I hate these jellys"
Me: "But they just want to stick those sharp objects in you and fill you with fluids"
LOP: "But i'm a girl"
Me "that just make it more enjoyable"
LOP: WTF?
*Jelly Kings juices splatter all over*
Whole party: WTF???

I once stared at some guy in LD, whispered "death awaits us all" at them, and then threw myself into some spikes.

person in lockdown insults us the whole game (were on the same team)
we make a literal last 5 second comeback
person: good job
me: you insulted us the whole time
person:even gutter trash has winning moments
Could be this guy