Spiral Knights - Jim Dale plays bad videogames: Fantasy Online (Current: Chap 2)

Jim Dale plays bad videogames: Fantasy Online (Current: Chap 2)

39 replies [Last post]

Sat, 02/04/2012 - 11:33

Jim-Dale

[Atuor's Nose: This thread may contain foul language or the letter "I". If you are tiny baby man please click here.]

Prologue:

http://www.kongregate.com/games/PixelatedGames/fantasy-online

Maybe 1 or 2 people remember Jim Dale's Lettuce Play of Realm of the Mad God that never got finished. That game was designed to routinely knack your sacks with a steel-toed boot and have you come back asking for seconds. The trick was that the game had you hooked in way that you could never finish the game/grinding.

Fantasy Online fails at everything, but it has a screenshot feature making this thread much easier. Let's find out why.

Jim Dale will be skipping character creation, but here is a summary:

-You start out as a naked baby
-You get plastic surgery to turn into an anime
-You get to listen to the same track of music until it is deafening
-You kill boring RPG enemies
-Jim Dale will be playing as MikeDawson
-Pikminrules was playing as ShrimpBaby, but quit in 5 minutes

In the next update that comes whenever, we/lonely Jim Dale will start off in Copyright Infringement Town. Here Jim Dale will discuss the nature of quests and the true power of Kongregate(?). This will not be fun.

Mon, 02/06/2012 - 06:47

Jim-Dale

Mental sickness

CHAPTER 1: What is this

This game will give you rectal cancer of the mouth. Jim Dale already hears "JIM DALE YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR FO IS NOT DAGO PLUMBER" Jim Dale assures you IT WILL DESTROY YOU.

This game has a boring first town called Noob Town in the developer's attempt to be funny. Jim Dale likes to call it Copyright Infringement Town. Take a guess why.

The game functions similarly to SK in that IT LIMITS GAME TIME. Normally this would be bad, but WHY WOULD YOU COME BACK TO THIS GAME. Sleep is what determines how much EXP, coins, etc you get from doing stuff. It depletes every time you do something, and fully regens in 8 hours. It is set back to 100 when you level up making it POINTLESS, but it may be a problem in later levels, perhaps if you get addicted to this game and are a hollow shell of a man. We will get to those pink things later.

You may have thought, what the Jim Dale is Jim Dale wearing? That is Kongregate my friend. Pure physical manifestation. The slime hat (if you could even tell it was a slime) is a costume item, and the only hat worn in miles. The blades are KONGREBLADES, they have the power of Kong in every slash (?). It doesn't matter what powers them, they give Jim Dale a HUGE starting advantage over everyone else. Even with this, Jim Dale still felt burdened by long grinding, imagine players with no advantages. No other player seems to have these, making them EXTREMELY RARE. Jim Dale can't wait to delete these in front of a hardcore player.

Combat is nothing. You stand in front of monsters while your numbers fight their numbers. The sprites don't even move and WHY IS JIM DALE GIANT. At random times it seems, Jim Dale was given uber power ups which allowed him to kill most enemies in 1 hit. Why.

QUESTS! Remember that Jim Dale video Jim Dale made mocking what will probably become the new mission system? THAT IS THIS GAME EXCEPT YOU ARE ALONE. Here is the quest lowdown:

-Kill x # of enemies
-Collect x # of items (from enemies)
-talk to someone
-buy gems

The game tries to invoke humor mocking MMOs and their nature of grinding and repetitive quests except YOU CAN'T DO THAT IF YOUR MMO IS NO DIFFERENT. Do you think you're special by doing this FO? The hands of Lakitu will not come down and jerk of- Jim Dale is getting ahead of himself. Under the category "Kill monsters for items" one quest bothered me in particular. On [Crap] Island (read Pirate Island) there is a quest where you must collect old VHS porn tapes. These tapes are locked in special chests requiring a lock-pick to open. THESE COST REAL MONEY. Jim Dale could easily get GEMS (read REAL MONEY) by doing stupid surveys for Kreds, but Jim Dale REFUSES to support these vile men with even a single cent. This quest is now IMPOSSIBLE.

Jim Dale finished n00b island, crab coast (and got some too), and half of pirate island. We will next explore some [crappy] mines where more GEMS will probably come into play.

END NOTES:

Jim Dale feels sick. This game has given Jim Dale sickness with heavy heart and aches all over. Hide your kids and your wife from this game. If you do play, only play on days where the world doesn't need your pathetic existence. Splash your computer with holy water a few times just to be safe.

WELP BACK TO PLAYING

Fri, 02/10/2012 - 13:04

Jim-Dale

SMOKEWEEDERRYDAY

Chapter 2 is coming along fine, having currently more than double the last chapter's screenshots. The hard part is that due to the nature of quests (kill, fetch, talk) there is not much to talk about besides begin angry and slowly dying.

After Chapter 2 will be a single intermission of another bad video game. These intermissions will be only 1 episode, but cover the whole game. The next game might be about an average Joe who does not even look remotely concerned. Can you guess what game it is?

Jim Dale wants to hear from you about limitations to make this more interesting.

Should Jim Dale never use Gems?

Should Jim Dale not be allowed to mute the music?

Should Jim Dale play thee whole game?

Should Jim Dale have intermissions?

What else do you challenge Jim Dale to do?

Tue, 02/07/2012 - 19:02

Fehzor

Not Jim Dale would like to

Not Jim Dale would like to see Jim Dale play more, until he finds said 'elite player' to delete his hat in front of. Jim Dale should also play as much of the game as possible, and should take more pictures.

Fri, 02/10/2012 - 13:06

Jim-Dale

Jim Dale has also not noticed

Jim Dale has also not noticed any central hub for players. Once you are done with an area, it is advisable to never go there again. Because of this talk is rare and nobody is your friend. We will get into players for the second Chapter

Fri, 02/10/2012 - 13:30

Demonicsothe

Not Jim Dale advises Jim Dale

Not Jim Dale advises Jim Dale to go as much indepth as he can handle about the class and points system of FO, specifically the lack of possible diversity.

Sun, 02/12/2012 - 10:18

Jim-Dale

FUN NOWHERE IN SIGHT

Chapter 2: Illusion

Before we start, Kong has been a little antsy about adblock. Because THIS is a game you want to support, I advise you disable adblock and eat whatever traces of money you have. Jim Dale has sarcasm.

Note: Screenshots will never be in chronological order.

Jim Dale now enters stanky ass caves with a new gameplay perk, can you guess what it is? Torches cost 20 coins to buy and light your way for 10 minutes. At least they don't cost gems to buy.

The monsters encountered are not very powerful, but can swarm you in large numbers. One of the many failures about this game is that aggressive monsters attack you on the spot. When you log in and go past the loading screen, you make be already at half health due to spawning in a monster pool. Thee game also has no sound effects, making it very hard to detect when you are being attacked. There is but one way to counter this, if you don't engage in combat with attacking monsters, it is quite possible to OUTHEAL THEM.

Speaking of pests, "What about other players?" asks Not Jim Dale. Other players exist for the sole cause of stealing your kills. This is a problem in caves due to your torches being timed, you can easily waste light while waiting for Sir Doitchbag to to finish battling the boss monster.

Remember those random powers? It is a common known fact that Asian people have all the superpowers, but got those powers from America. The Asians people according to FO, sit in dank caves to sell their disabilities to adventurers for coin. These powers provide a boost to your stats which affects anybody in your radius. These effects stack with lesser versions, so you need them on constantly to get anywhere. That's about it.

Presents are special gifts given daily in a failed attempt to keep you playing. They contain power ups that hardly do anything or XP. Too bad none of these presents would keep Jim Dale playing if he wasn't trying to slander the game.

This is the FULLSCREEN version of the game (fullscreen resolution depicted). Not only does it look god awful, but powers do not work with fullscreen, making it useless.

There is a trading house if you wish to sell what remains of your privates. You can buy or sell items for a better price than shops, this helps you get the rare drops you want easily and you can sell the rare drops you somehow got the first kill there too.

Next post will explain the stats system.

Sun, 02/12/2012 - 10:30

Jim-Dale

There are three types of

There are three types of combat styles to choose from. Melee, melee, or melee. OK, OK Jim Dale pulls your appendage. There is Arrows and Magic too. Arrows is a weak version of melee that should never be used, it allows you to get an extra hit in before being slaughtered by melee combat. Magic allows you to...it's a weak version of arrows.

The game encourages melee combat from the start with the stick to melee fight with. Once you are given a choice, you see that magic and arrows are ineffective against the tutorial enemies. The enemies even drop ONLY SWORDS to make sure you pick melee fighting. Magic spells and archer abilities come much later in the game, but by then you've already facked yourself.

Learning skills and wearing equipment is governed by your Strength, Stamina, Intellect, and agility skills. Jim Dale would say that Strength is for melee, Stamina is for armor, agility is for arrows, and intellect is for magic but Jim Dale does not like to speak [bullcrap]. You do not need a magic wand to cast magic spells or arrows to use archer skills. You can be a melee man and use every skill if your stats in that area are high enough. By the time you favor something though, you've lost precious skill points to areas you're not focusing on while you are a noobie. This can make you lag behind in terms of leveling and when you should be able to equip armor and weapons geared for the next area.

You can of course RESET YOUR stats, there is a nice button for it. Let's try it out.

1) Click the button, get told to unequip all your items.
2) Unequip all your melee items. Become nude.
3) Click thee button agYOU MUST PAY GEMS

This is a dirty trick that requires you to humiliate yourself before telling you that you need to pay. During that time any monster could stealth kill your naked self and cause you to lose whatever dying causes you to lose. Jim Dale has not died yet, but is not in the mood to demo it. It is currently unknown what happens, but it must be harsh.

Next: A concerned Intermission

Sun, 02/12/2012 - 13:06

Mastersleet-Alt

I played

I played This :D For a while. Im lvl 63 Rb but its boring

Mon, 02/13/2012 - 16:13

Jim-Dale

Jim Dale...supposes he should

Jim Dale...supposes he should have mentioned MINING. He recently discovered it's possible to do in F2P, but not entirely. It's just REALLY REALLY HARD. For the chapter after intermission.

Also if your wondering:

1 gem = 1 kred
1 kred = 10 cents
1 gem = 10 cenJIM DALE IS NOT CHEAP

Wed, 02/15/2012 - 00:33

#10

Fehzor

How does one mine?

Sat, 02/18/2012 - 17:21

#11

Miqueas

you gotta buy a pickaxe,

you gotta buy a pickaxe, equip it as a weapon and attack the (insert thing here) vein, same with chests and lockpick, pickaxe and lockpick cost 10 gems each, i got the 2. Those gems came from the so stupid PRESENTS, which have a 1% to give 5 gems

Mon, 03/05/2012 - 06:26

#12

Myg-Mog

Flabgibberish Bearico

Yeah, that game really has nothing much going for it. If you wanna play a game with a hilarious non-existant ranged system, play AQWorlds. Difference is that game is hilarious and makes you feel good. Some places have awesome music, it's usually silent, but at least you aren't listening to the same loop, over and over again. I eventually started listening to ParagonX9 and all of her cool stuff. Ah, it saved me and is the reason I still have ears.

I've only met one cool person, only ONE cool person on there, and almost everyone (besides teh creepers!) I met on here is cool as snow. Plus the Guild System (What System?) on that game is LAZY. I don't even know what taking over zones is for anyways. Far as I know, they can have those stupid zones; I'll just keep murdering monsters with MAGIC. (because I got gems 3 times in a row, my gawd miracle in heaven) I used magic to spite everybody, but it's just like all of those other Flash MMO's that are obsessed with the Micro-Transaction Raptor.

So...

I'll just keep playing this and be happy ^.O

Mon, 03/19/2012 - 19:44

#13

Wiki-Dale

Piness

Wiki-Dale is here. Wiki-Dale will continue where Jim-Dale left off. Jim-Dale is gone due to technical issues. Wiki-Dale hopes he returns, Wiki-Dale will be placeholder.

Fri, 03/23/2012 - 12:27

#14

Kive

.....

RIP jim dale

Fri, 03/23/2012 - 14:07

#15

Wiki-Dale

You misunderstand. Wiki-Dale

You misunderstand. Wiki-Dale is Jim-Dale. They are same person.

Also POINT OF DECISION. Should Jim Dale buy tools with Kreds (that Jim-Wiki-Dale got for filling out hispanic surveys) or should he try to be the ultimate free player?

Also Wiki-Dale was going to do a short on Concerned Joe but screw that. It's dumb don't play it.

Fri, 03/23/2012 - 15:53

#16

Kive

-_-

you arent jim dale

1. to good english

2. not always talking from third person

3. youre a bush O.o

4. you were a rock but tjen transformed into a bush

5. why wiki dale as a name

6. jim dale dosent respond that fast -_-

7. the magic conch shell said "NO"

RIP jim dale just know youre corpse is being inhabitted by a monkey

Fri, 03/23/2012 - 19:14

#17

Wiki-Dale

Wiki-Dale is so Jim-Dale can

Wiki-Dale is so Jim-Dale can post on the wiki, because it's becoming obvious the steam issues will not be fixed.

Sat, 03/24/2012 - 15:35

#18

Thimol

-----

1. to good english

Hie thee hence.

Tue, 03/27/2012 - 19:55

#19

Wiki-Dale

"Also POINT OF DECISION.

"Also POINT OF DECISION. Should Jim Dale buy tools with Kreds (that Jim-Wiki-Dale got for filling out hispanic surveys) or should he try to be the ultimate free player?"

Wed, 03/28/2012 - 05:12

#20

Shue-Donnym

Xplad votes that

Xplad votes that Wiki-Jim-Dale be the ultimate hispanic survey-filling free player.

Wed, 03/28/2012 - 17:30

#21

Wiki-Dale

But that is both choices! If

But that is both choices! If Jim Dale/Wiki Dale doesn't buy stupid gems, he can use his Hispanic money to buy ...something else!

Thu, 03/29/2012 - 00:49

#22

Starmandeluxe

Starman Deluxe votes that

Starman Deluxe votes that Jim-Wiki-Jim-Dale-Wiki spends his Kreds on Realm of the Mad God instead. And then maybe Dale-Wiki-Dale-Jim can reviewify that game.

Thu, 03/29/2012 - 01:04

#23

Shoebox

I vote Peso-Dale spends his

I vote Peso-Dale spends his worthless monopoly money on some other game he can complain about.

Thu, 03/29/2012 - 02:54

#24

Toastnaut

Pesos not Kreds!

I am not Jim-Dale but I am also not Not-Jim-Dale and I vote for a review of the hispanic surveys.

Jim-Dale should use his Kreds to buy tools to destroy his rare items in front of a serious FO player if he can find one. Can Jim-Dale even do that? New challenge!

Thu, 03/29/2012 - 18:57

#25

Wiki-Dale

Realm of the Mad God

Realm of the Mad God

Get out.

Alright maybe Jim Dale can do a new Lets Play since the horrid thing is on Steam now.

Also the survey review sounds like a good idea.

That will take awhile so look at this in the meantime.

Sun, 04/01/2012 - 15:42

#26

Wiki-Dale

http://www.kongrepay.com

http://www.kongregate.com/games/FlyAnvil/decision

Flyanvil has released their new game on Kong called Decision. Flyanvil makes cool top-down games, too bad FO leaked their promo into it.

Also Jim Dale (Jim Dale means Wiki Dale) chooses to ultimately buy the pickaxe and lockpick. Here is Jim Dale's explanation.

Fantasy Online has its gameplay surrounded by 2 things, pay to win and GRINDING. Having both a pickaxe and lockpick opens Jim Dale to a faster way to STOP PLAYING. When you are crafting using the stuff you mined, you can either pay gems to get your item immediately or you can wait HOURS or DAYS for the "process" to finish. But this is not a bad thing, that means 8 hours of NOT PLAYING! Jim Dale can do many more exciting things in 8 HOURS. This also means the LP will be finished SOONER, which will prevent ALREADY EXISTENT REPETITIVENESS. This opens more opportunity and lessens deadly radiation coming from the screen into Jim Dale's fragile mind.

The end.

Sun, 04/01/2012 - 16:32

#27

Artistbma

@Wikidale :O The video that

@Wikidale

:O The video that you labeled "this" is the strangest thing ive ever seen.

Thu, 04/05/2012 - 21:40

#28

Wiki-Dale

CHAPTER 3: ROID RAGE

JIM DALE IS BACK WITH A TERRIBLE ALT!

Let's get to the point. Jim Dale decided to use Hispanic Gems to buy a pickaxe and a lockpick. Jim Dale will review them.

Review: THESE ARE THE ONLY TOOLS YOU NEED

End Review.

Lockpicks and pickaxes work how you think they would. Ores and chests are [special] monsters that can only be put down by attacking them with certain tools. This is not at all bad programming, but a new and innovative way to obtain treasure.

Jim Dawson returned to Booty Island to find that treasure chests suck. But Jim Dale bought the lockpick for FUTURE REASONS. The premium quests from using the lockpick granted more experience and AN EYEPATCH. Seeing as how facewear is distributed in this game, this is what we are wearing for the rest of the game.

Mining is the undeserving moneymaker of the game. Stores buy ores for good prices, and the player market buys it for much much more. Veins of ores are never crowded since nobody spends money on this game. You can mine while recovering from monster attacks. You can server hop to maximize your profits.

Thee player market functions as an annoying pit stop to sell all yoOH NO JIM DALE DIED. THIS IS THE END OF FANTASY ONLINE! Hahaha, Jim Dale kids. The first reaction to dying was a slight feeling of joy at the thought of ragequitting. What happens when you die? Do you lose all your items? All your coins? All your experience? No. NOTHING HAPPENS. All it does is respawns you in 30 seconds at low health because you can't get enough of this great game. The low health factor makes it easy for some monsters to SPAWNCAMP YOU.

You want Jim Dale to join your group other player? Jim Dale says no. Jim Dale said no. STOP SENDING JIM DALE REQUESTS. JIM DALE SERVER HOPS TO SAME SERVER BY ACCIDENT. FINE JIM DALE WILL JOIN YOUR PARTY. Turns out this was the best thing that could happen to Jim Dale. Parties allow players to team up on monster behind to complete quests easier and slay boss monsters. The experience, coins, and loot gained is split. Everyone gets (Reward/# of group members) amount on kill, even if you weren't involved. Too bad Jim Dale has no friends to play with.

Planning ahead is essential to any RPG if you want to make the pictures. Jim Dale already picked out his linear armor based on STRENGTH. Strength just makes you have more armor and blah blah, attack power is determined by level and weapon. To get armor, Jim Dale must spend valuable time mining durable and armor quality material such as silver. Once the armor is made, it can be upgraded using more materials from enemies such as Anus Clams and Anus Rocks. Crafting materials takes HOURS, but like Jim Dale said, that's time spent not playing. Inventory space gets tight while crafting too, BUT THERE IS A WAY. When crafted items are finished, they are mailed to you by mail. You can abuse mail by keeping the items in the letters for at most 1 month. Take that video game. Jim Dale encourages you to exploit this game as much as possible.

This is the set Jim Dale might have endgame.( Minus the Axe, Rage, and Pauldron. The last 2 require more gems.) It focuses on roid rage and hurting loved ones around you. Take a look at how much it will take. (choose show entire crafting tree) AUGH

This is where Jim Dale stands as of when this was posted.

Since this game is repetitive to hell, Jim Dale will now only post things related to quests, monsters, etc. when the are notable. This goes for exploits too.

NOTABLES:

Jim Dale kills Micheal Jackson while Pretty Young Thing was on the radio in the most offensive game ever. If MJ was removed in Plants vs Zombies, why can't this crappy game be sued too. FOR EVERYTHING. The bad stealing of assets will never end.

UNIQUE ENEMY: CATAPULTS - they're actually called some stupid joke name but it is unfunny.

It's fun to watch others die. Burn in hell for 30 seconds monster hogger.

Melee combat sometimes gets out of hand in a literal sense.

These bats here drop strength rings, which are very a necessity for the near future, they have almost a 0% drop rate, but Jim Dale got 2 after hundreds of kills.

EXPLOITS:

Mail Exploit: See above

Other Mail exploit: It might be quite possible to use mail as an infinite storage, but it is RISKY. You must put an item you want to store up for the player market at a very low price, then immediately buy it. This will put it in your mail for a month, you must remember to renew monthly though and you risk your item being bought.

Fast Traveling/Stucking up: You can use the /stuck command to teleport back to the main square or entrance of an area. This is useful if you don't want to trek all the way back from the back of a smelly cave or to cut your town to town time in half. To do this for towns, walk until you reach the beginning of the next area, walk a bit more, then /stuck to teleport to the next town.

CONFUSE BAD AI: Monsters that are aggressive don't follow you, but where you WILL be. You can fool them by clicking far away places for fun(?). Beware though, as soon as a monster loses sight of you, they regain back all of their health because screw this game.

And so ends Jim Dale chapter 3, here is what we look like now.

VIEWER TIME:

Jim Dale has the Kongreslime hat, but the new helmet Jim Dale has looks cooler. Should Jim Dale ditch the Kongreslime hat? If taken off, it will take up precious inventory space. Any other game Jim Dale should review? (That is bad.)

Tue, 04/03/2012 - 18:18

#29

Miqueas

(stupid of the audience

(stupid of the audience stands up and asks)
Mr. Mikedawson, those stupids brainwashed me and i got a little hooked to make the tier1 strength set, and i must say that the first part of it its the worst, then it just become hours of waiting for the item to make(YAY) so should i ask.......will sir mikedawson get to buy trollfacemask at the market for very high prices?

Wed, 04/04/2012 - 03:41

#30

Canned-Bread

"I'm going to shove this disc up your ass and twist it"

"Nice playthrough," said Canned-Bread.
"But maybe you could take some time off to continue this."

Wed, 04/04/2012 - 15:11

#31

Wiki-Dale

Maybe when Jim Dale gets his

Maybe when Jim Dale gets his old account back.

Also we are looking for foolish persons who took the unforgivable mistake of playing this game to join us on the monotone quest of slaying monsters in specific numbers.

Thu, 04/05/2012 - 20:46

#32

Wiki-Dale

Jim Dale LP Update

Jim Dale LP Update Released
April 5, 2012 - Wiki-Dale

An update to Jim Dale plays bad videogames has been released. The update will be applied automatically when you restart Jim Dale plays bad videogames. The major changes include:

-Did not include hidden content.

-Player value changed to 2

-Updated localization files.

Trivia-Dale: The most priciest item seen so far in the game can be bought for 800 gems. That's the equivalent of about $40-$80! Zounds!

Thu, 04/05/2012 - 20:59

#33

Bikwin

BONUS CHAPTER!!!!!!!1

Alright, so after looking at this thread I've decided to play this game for myself, and jesus christ is it bad. However, it was for the sake of convincing other people to not play this, because I don't think Jim Dale explains how bad this game is. While his explanations are a lot more brief, I'm going to describe the boring events in a smaller timeframe so you can see just how boring they are.

A while ago I started this and quit after 10 minutes of playing after realizing just how bad this game is. But thanks to my masochistic game preferences, I was able to play enough to get some sort of content out of this boring pile of poops.

The last time I left off, I started off in noob town. As of then I read up on a few things and decided to ditch that terrible axe and put all my skill points into intellect and become a wizard because wizards are cool I guess. From my little experience of what I've played, being a wizard gives you a lot of power and the ability to attack at a range, which is useless when the enemy runs up to you whenever you attack anyway. You can also spam a bunch of spells to your heart's content, since early on in the game you get a buff that makes you regenerate energy faster so you never run out. All of this comes at the cost of dying easily because all you're wearing is a robe. By the way, did I forget to mention that none of the jokes in this game are actually funny?

Did I really mention how ugly this game is? If the game had decent spriting I'd probably have played it more, but these look like they were made in about a minute in MS Paint or they were just the default sprites for a bootlegged RPG maker. Either way, everything is painfully tiny and bland.

So as I continue on my wizard quest I quickly conquer the boss of noob island and continue on to crab coast, which is surprisingly full of crabs. However, only the coast section actually has crabs in it, despite the name of the entire area being crab coast. There's also a crab boss in there, but it was just as boring as the last one so there was no point in taking pics of it.

Next up I arrive at the next town, which is pretty much the same as the last. While these screenshots seem as if they were taken over a short period of time, but the game is so slow paced that it feels like you're never getting any progress done.

So after killing tomatos and getting high with zombified vegetables, I go off to kill the third boss because some little girl is the worst NPC I have ever seen and she keeps sending people off into the mountains to get killed by poop spiders that aren't harming her in the slightest. Who even hates spiders these days, I mean seriously. Anyway, upon my first time fighting this boss, I actually died, which only takes 30 seconds to respawn, as stated previously. However, what wasn't stated was that you respawn at gravestone landmarks, so you really just spawn outside of the boss's place instead of in town. The next time I manage to kill the spider by spamming the healing spell a lot.

The last boss of crab coast is up next, who is somewhat tricky. By tricky I mean that you have to spam the healing spell but you have to activate it with the right timing or else you won't heal fast enough. So after doing that I go into the next area and I consider myself to be finished with this for now because I already have three of the badges on kongregate anyway. For the record, this is what ShrimpBaby the wizard looks like at the end of all this. Underneath that indifferent pixellated anime face is a recollection of painfully boring experiences.

In conclusion, this game has literally nothing to offer that isn't any better than any other MMO I've played. It feels as if it were a test to see how generic and boring an MMO could get, and if it were, it has definitely won. I recall playing an incredibly boring MMO a few years ago for about a day where you went through this one big dungeon and the only way to fight was to hold down the ctrl key. Even THAT was more interesting than this game because you could play as a skeleton and you could hold down a button to make the skeleton dance. Fantasy Online, however, has exactly zero of these intreresting things, so don't play it. Don't play it. Please don't play it. Please DON'T PLAY IT. DON'T. DON'T PLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPFPFPFPFPPFPFPFPFP

Fri, 04/06/2012 - 01:51

#34

Canned-Bread

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

So the only computer in Canned Bread's house that could properly play spiral knights went to hell.
Canned Bread tried to distract itself via crappy flash games.
Unfortunately they were terrible at holding Canned Bread's attention.
That left Canned Bread with only one choice.
Canned Bread facerolled the keyboard for a name and punched some faces and stole a cardboard box and kicked skeleton ass.
Now Canned Bread is Solid Snake.
Sorta.

Sat, 04/07/2012 - 18:08

#35

Wiki-Dale

Jim Dale can see through

Jim Dale can see through canned-bread's lies! That box only comes in mid game! He obviously has played before and had it in his inventory!

Or he bought it at the Player Market by searching box for some reason.

Sat, 04/07/2012 - 18:17

#36

Canned-Bread

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

You are correct! Canned Bread had many gold things he had no use for so Canned Bread searched through the player market and snapped one up for a few thousand hispanic money.
Also Canned Bread made the horrible mistake of playing from the official website. This resulted in many horrible things including
-a crappy random password
-free player hell
-very few surveys to fill
-dwayne johnson

Now send Canned Bread a friend request.

Sat, 04/07/2012 - 18:50

#37

Wiki-Dale

Jim Dale tried before, but

Jim Dale tried before, but Canned Bread must be online for that.

Jim Dale will play now.

Thu, 04/12/2012 - 18:13

#38

Bikwin

I have recieved word that Jim

I have recieved word that Jim Dale LPs of bad games will continue somewhere else as long as you join his group. That is all.

Sun, 04/22/2012 - 21:02

#39

Kive

√

RISE FROM YOURE GRAVE AND RESCUE MY DAUGHTER

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Jim Dale plays bad videogames: Fantasy Online (Current: Chap 2)