Screenshot Story Soirée (It's also a contest)

Does anybody remember this thread? http://forums.spiralknights.com/en/node/782
In case there's somebody who's too lazy to lick the link, let me condense it. The thread linked to above contains the coherent ramblings of one very special person, Guyinshinyarmour. He laid upon us glorious words accompanied by the images he took with him from the Clockworks, and threaded together into a necklace or left alone, the pearls of his story shone with a luminous majesty all of their own. And drawn towards this glow came others, who too created pearls of their own.
Alas, as such is the passage of time so did the pearls become lost.
But no more! I shall endeavour to recreate that time! To bring more pearls into existence!
Wut?
It's a contest. The aim of which to is make a text post with embedded screenshots taken from Spiral Knights. Creativity is appreciated.
The best one will receive a Lockbox, the two runner-ups will get a Brandish. Unless a crazy amount of people enter I will be the sole judge.
And no, you cannot create two distinct adventure-posts. Two posts continuing the other, however? Acceptable.
The deadline is the end of this month. Have fun!
Entrants

Crazy,insane,mentally ill,lunatic..I can go on and on,these are just an example of the names I've been called by other spiral knights. "is this a joke?" "go away.." "hahahahaha..no seriously i'll shoot you if you won't go away right now" ..these are just an example of the responses I got for trying to warn the other spiral knights. I'm afraid all of my efforts went down to the drain. But fear not! As I have just acquired a proof! A proof that I was right! A proof that show them all..all of them gathered at one place and plotting their evil schemes of taking over haven..that's right,THE VIALS AND HEALTH CAPSULES ARE NOW THE ENEMY! Driven by greed and desire to control,the vials and health capsules are now aware to their power and now they are about to turn against the spiral knights. It's not too late my friends,it's time to fight back! They must not be victorious!
http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=160247695

Here's the end of the month and with it the contest.
Winner: Dreathuxy
Runner-up: Mega-Jerk
Expect to see your prizes soon.
As I crossed the chasm, I could see the light of haven near me and my squadmate. And then, as we got off of the elevator, we head a rustle, then a giant vitapod came out of nowhere. We tried to fight it, but it had 1 to many health. It consumed us. Rhendon tried to save us, but it ultimately ended up as a staring contest.
http://cloud-2.steampowered.com/ugc/902110606473970588/B1A074C400E878C73...
That picture is from my steam.