Really? You randomly post just so you can get the new page?

((Smh))

The boy, clearly annoyed by the Beta Swarm's stubbornness, ran straight towards it and did a Tornado drill straight at it's chest.

With a dismissing wave of his hand, Dexterious tears the rock away, and throws it at the Beta Swarmling.

Erk shook his head, watching as a multitude of ghosts did absolutely nothing to the Beta Swarmling, while the new guy's whirling sword attack forced it to retreat.

"What kind of Paladin summons ghosts, anyway?" Erk mused.

"Not sure. He's probably not from Elibe. Kiiiiinda reminds me of Sain, though..."

"WOOOOOO!" Rick pumped his metal fist in the air. "Da-da-da-DA-da-da-da-da-DAAH DAAH DAAH..." Rick continued with his entire theme song while beating his chest and doing a ridiculous victory dance.

"Okay." Erk began examining the terrain. Which way to go... "First, we should see to... that boy. One of us should heal his wounds, and ask for his name, so we don't have to call him 'That boy'."

"I'll get on that." Serra walked towards the boy and used her Mend Staff to heal any wounds he may have taken.

"Right. And as for you, Dexterious..." Erk lowered his voice to a whisper. "You can say 'love' all you want, but it is not 'love' to, in the middle of pitched combat, hit on a girl that's already in a relationship, and in the process, distract her from an incoming attack. Your flirting with Serra is obnoxious. Endangering her is inexcusable."

"Danger? Where's the danger? I'm built for danger." Rick, at hearing 'danger' offhand, had suddenly swung around, jumping at the chance to find danger.

"Danger? Is there danger over there?!"

"No, there's no danger," Erk said. "Rick just misheard me."

"Okay, good." Serra asked the boy, "What's your name?"

((All this time and I haven't even thought of a name for him....))

Rather than tell Serra his name, he stayed quiet, unsure of whether to trust them or not.

Dexterious claps Erk's shoulder sarcastically, and dismissed his undead horde with a wave of his hand.

"The heart wants what it wants," Dexterious says, winking at Erk. He ruffles Erk's hair, and says:

"I hate to break it to you... but you are a JOKE. You aren't real, in any universe but your own. You were created for the amusement of human children, and for nothing more. Let me show you something..." Dexterious opens a portal with his hand, and it shows an image of Japanese children huddled around the television.

"See that... it's called anime. It is a popular style of CARTOON on Earth. So someday, when that show goes off the air..." Dexterious waves his hand and dispels the portal. "That happens."

(( I just PULVERIZED the fourth wall. ))

((Wrong fourth wall. Fire Emblem is a video game, and the only entry with Erk and Serra in it has been out of production for years now. Nice try, though.))

"So that's all I am, huh?"

Erk was about to make a snarky comeback and point out that his argument wasn't even answered, but Serra's overhearing Dexterious did the job for him.

Serra, the boy all but forgotten, ran right up to Dexterious, furious. "Is that what I am to you? Nothing but... amusement?!"

"Oh man. You just screwed u-"

"NOT NOW, RICK!" Serra glowered at Dexterious. "You taunted Erk, you nearly got me hit, and now... THIS INSULT! Get OUT OF MY SIGHT, you posturing lowlife, or so help me..."

Erk was surprised. Serra was furious. And... posturing lowlife? She'd improved her vocabulary.

"Serra? Let's be off. We'll ignore this cretin."

"Of course. In fact... Erk?" Serra handed Erk the Unicorn... summoning thingy. "Check this to see if it's not some cursed relic of some kind- he seems like the type to give me something cursed. Then, if not, you can have it- I'm terrible at riding anyway."

"Uh... thanks." Serra'd said some ascerbic things in her time, but... wow. Erk would feel sorry for Dexterious if the latter hadn't just tried to invalidate his existence.

"So... where'd all the danger go?"

"I don't know... but it'll come back." Erk shook his head. "Whatever these monsters, these... Swarmlings are, they're a threat to Elibe. We'll need to look for some way to track them..."

"Your wish is my command, madam." Dexterious says, sweeping himself into a bow. He walks to the boy, almost fatherlike in his demeanour. He draws a small sword from his belt, and tucks it into the lad's belt.

"A fine blade, for a mighty Champion." He says quietly, ruffling his hair.

He steps on his cloud horse, and begins to ride away. As he was about to exit the portal, a ghoul appears behind Serra. It grabs her, and shoves it's fangs, trying to drink from her jugular.

Dexterious turns, looking morose. He fires a single arrow, it flies past her head and into the creature's eye. Brains spatter out of it, and seep into the girl's hair. The angels from the sky leave, and the skeletons fall into piles of bones. The portal disappears behind him.

((Know what? Screw that. Serra's a Level 20 Bishop with an A Support Bonus. She can take out one Ghoul just fine.))

...Except Serra, having heard the portal opening behind her, had already leapt back and to the side, dodging the Ghoul's attack, and retaliated with Shine, which had tripled might against the undead Ghoul. This was immediately followed by a Bolganone blast and a rocket. Between that and the arrow, the ghoul was doomed.

"Man, that was awesome!" Rick shouted. "It came out and tried to bite you, and you just jumped out of the way, and you're like, BAM! Super light! And then the wizard guy roasted him and my rocket and the knight's arrow, and that thing was dead."

Erk turned to face the voice from behind. "A threat to everything, you say. Finally, some information. What are these monsters, and are they all nearly invulnerable to magic like that one was? Because, if they are..." Erk shook his head. "We need a proper army."

"And more weapons." Serra looked at her Shine tome. "I think I'll only get four or five more uses out of this tome before it runs out of power."

((So Dexterious reached under my hood and ruffled my hair. Okay))

The boy inspected the blade, pulling it out of his belt and checking for any symbols engraved into the side. It was a finely crafted blade, but was not to his liking. Before he can say anything, Dexterious has already left through the portal.

The boy sighs, dropping the blade into a white void he summoned and watched as it disappears. "Yet another blade I won't be using." He walks over to the others as the Swarm mysteriously subsided. For now. "You wanted to know what my name was, right? I don't just give it to anyone, so I have to be able to trust you first."

A nickname? The boy had a look of confusion on his face. 'A nickname could help out in the long run. Maybe I could at least tell them my code.' He looked back to them. "I can give you my codename. It's Asura. Like the deity."

((It's taken Malk a while to post, so... here I go.))

"Hmm. Good to know. And welcome to our team, Asura." Erk didn't know of any deity named Asura, but then he didn't know of worlds made entirely of cubes, Aperture Science Handheld Portal Devices, and a lot of other things, until just now. He figured he'd find out more information as he went.

"Note to self. No paint jobs."

Erk shook his head. "No, Rick, if you really want a paint job, you can just tell us about it."

"What about his other question?" Serra asked. "Where should we go if we want to fight these guys?"

((More towards the ones in Hinduism and Buddhism. Mostly referring to the (Demi)God of Wrath.))

Asura looks around, finding that all the Swarmlings have disappeared for now. "Strange, this place was riddled with those Swarm creatures." He turned to the man. "What happened to all of them? Did they leave with that armored Swarm?"

((Hang on, since when did I make the swarm flee this dimention? The only swarm that I made flee is the Beta Swarm))

((I never said they left, as a matter of fact, they should be still around everyone's characters. They just got bored of attacking everyone I guess and continued destroying that universe))

"Have you tried looking down?" asked the man.

"Hee hee hee! I'm so happy I could just tear out your innards and strangle you with them!" The insane god giggles, as Serra's staff has no effect on Wabajack's enchantment.

"You see, sweetface. This here is a Daedric artifact. Not something that can be easily reversed by your parlor tricks." Sheogerath says, as he forces the chicken to peck it's own chest out. He laughs as it's heart comes out, then turns it into a goat at the wave of his hand.

"Sooo, I heard there was some CRAZY to be done. And I looooooooove CRAZY!"

The disembodied voice continues.

(( Dude, Sheogerath is a GOD. He is literally, a GOD of madness. I don't think his magic is poorly structured. ))

"Pish posh, missy moo." Sheogerath says with a giggle, and the villager's brain bursts out of his skull. The brain then pulls a top hat out of it's interior, and dances a small jig before jumping away.

"Know who your dealing with yet? I only let you reverse that, because CHICKEN BRAIN IS SMALL!" Sheogerath yells out. A huge gate made of ivory appears out of nowhere, and a suited fellow walks out. He is wearing a pinstripe suit, and carrying a staff.

The staff looks like this

"Oi, not another psycho god...." Asura shook his head. "First Wyzen, now this."

(( I invented the Villager as my NPC. With him, I do as I please. ))

"I wouldn't DO THAT" Sheogerath says in his faint Scottish accent. He appears behind Erk and grabs the Villager. A portal appears, and he drags him in. A minute later, they re-appear. Sheogerath is holding a rabbit.

"He took ONE LOOK at my humble abode in Oblivion, and FREAKED OUT! I turned him into a rabbit to calm him down." He explains, turning the grass below everyone's feet into dung.

"Oh yeah. Daedra can only be BANISHED. Not killed, sweetie." He says sarcastically as he pulls a sandwich out of his top hat. He chews it thoughtfully, then casually flings a chicken at the sky. "Chickens love me!" He says at length.

Sheogerath then proceeds to dance a little jig, then the rabbit turns back into a person. Creating a wall between him and everyone else, he pulls the villager's guts out. He then yells something incoherent about narwhales and skips rope with the intestines.

Sheogerath then proceeds to smile at the group, and wipe his face on a giant kleenex that comes out of nowhere.

"Hello, govna!" He says in a now cockney accent. He twirls Wabbajack like a cane, and randomly fires a bolt of red energy at the distant city walls. Each brick turns into a goat, and all the goats run away in a stampede. He chuckles as several people are crushed.

Asura just watched as the madness unfolded, shaking his head when the trio again declared they were gonna kill Sheogorath. Clearly you can't kill a god, especially with conventional means like a rocket launcher. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a bar of chocolate, which he began munching on out of boredom.

Serra shook her head. "I don't think so. Did you just try to change around divine power? Oh, I'm sorry, bunny boy, but I don't think it did anything!" Rexcalibur was deflected, but Shine continued on its way, impervious to the Wabbajack's stupidity. Sheogorath would have to either dodge the attack or take the triple damage from Shine like a man.

As Erk saw the Wabbajack attack come his way, he shouted, "Now!"

At Erk's signal, Rick pulled Erk away from the bolts with his Portal Gun by placing the blue portal under his feet (having set the orange portal away from Sheogorath), then fired the orange portal on the ground right next to Sheogorath. What did this mean? A burst of Wabbajack bolts heading out of a portal next to Sheogorath, spreading out so that Erk, Serra and Rick could easily dodge them - unless they homed in, which was even BETTER for Erk, Serra, and Rick because then the bolts would hit Sheogorath, due to his position in between Rick's portal and Erk's team.

"See? Your own power is leveled against you." Erk cracked a smile. "Have you ever thought of what it would be like to die? Most likely not. Start thinking about it, because you can't avoid us forever!"

((Aperture Science Handheld Portal Devices have been tested against magical effects ten times as powerful as those found in Skyrim to see if they could change or remove portals. The results were very informative: they could not.))

"Hold it." Asura held his katana at Sheogorath's neck. "What the hell is your business here?" He looks at the Jarl. "Aside from your daily torturing of the locals?" Asura then raises a wall of fire between them and the others so they would stop attempting to kill Sheogorath.