...

I take the pedals out of your pedal-boat. While you frantically try to get off the said now stranded pedal boat, I throw a pair of nunchacku at your forehead, crippling you. I leap into the air ridiculously high and throw a 500 foot radius banana pie, covering your boat, and siphon the cookie.

I laugh as it washes off my compressed car, which expanded in the nick of time. Thanks for giving it a hot scrub! I run Use over and take the cookie, driving away into the sunrise.

I put a portal in Aperture Labs, and another under you. I close the portals to prevent you from escaping the test chambers.

I set Valve on fire, corrupting Portal (2).

I grab a megaphone and yell into your ear, deafening you. Then I send my army against your chicken and cow one. Epic fight! Over a cookie! I siphon the cookie and run away.

It's too bad my army of troops surpasses Graham's Number, which is more than the number of atoms in the universe. They shred your less than a millionth of a percent of "guards", easily overwhelm your pig army, and easily smite any other armies that attack.

Time to spawn 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 robotroops of 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 robots each to clash Pi's troops. Then I get the cookie back to I am no one.

I throw an Ipad keyboard at you! You are dazed and i MAKE OFF WITH THINE COOKIE

Remember, I don't have the cookie, THE SLURPUFF DOES

I laugh as people think they have the cookie and send in 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 armys which kill Malkalack, Sandwich-Potato, and Bustware, but don't get the cookie back since none of them actually have the cookie since the Slurpuff has it

/chases Slurpuff on a motor boat

I whack Leaf with bombhammer and thake the cookie back to Iamnoone. Later I summon 999^9 robotroops of 99 robots each to protect me and Iamnoone from everyone else.

I ummm... I teleport to the Slurpuff and feed it so much Mcdonald's it throws up the cookie. I take it and shove it into a secret comparment in my stomach.

I get tired of all this and murder all armys and make it so that no one can make anouther army

The Slurpuff is angry that there was no whipped dreams on any of the Mcdonald's it ate, nore was any of it sweet, (except the shakes) it goes and uses play rough on Sandwich-Potato out of anger, and plays REALLY rough. It puts Sandwich-Potato in a full body cast, eats the cookie, and uses surf to escape.

I do not starve to death, I instantly kill all of your army and you can not change that no matter what

you're soldiers have already been all killed, every one of them, no exceptions, nor making more

you do not have the cookie, deal with it

I eat the swag and absorb it, and turn the swag into more soldiers.

I quickly decide that fighting for one cookie is getting a bit excessive and use my battle move Summon Compromise. It fails because everyone wants the cookie so I grab it and hide in a UFO unicorn.

I take the cookie back to Iamnoone. And robotroops are strong enough to halt Sandwch's and 5Pi's army.

@Pipipipipi: No one is capable of eating cookie.

I summon nothing useful. While you stay still politely to acknowledge the (non-existent) summoned items, I siphon the cookie and skip away, grabbing Slurpuff and throwing it into a supernova.

I am in your magical narwhal's stomach, and proceed to quickly jump out of its mouth and steal your cookie.

I then dive into the ocean and drown at the very bottom.

I came in and cry as I see stupid spam in this thread. again. #3018

I go into space and take the cookie, nuff said

I don't need air actually

The game ends with me with the cookie, so I have the cookie now FoReVeR

I throw the cookie in a invincible box and put it in a museum before you destroy it, making it a part of history

I also put a certain vending machine in the museum, next to the cookie

I unbanish the museum to the Earth, along with 208741602796 security guards

basicly, it's impossible to steal the cookie anymore, because it will be forever history, FOREVER!!!