I join your cult and start hiding all the sugar because I know it's the one thing every nation could never do without. Even cocoa beans need sugar to become chocolate.
I send every member an email stating we need to invade and take over Iron Mountain that it is the only secure place big enough to hold all the world's sugar.
But then an army of mutated diaper-ants invade Iron Mountain to absorb all your sugar through their toenails.
The mutated diaper-ants can't penetrate the iron walls.
They become enraged and attack people in the surrounding towns.
The people all become afflicted with the diaper-ant rash, become blind, and wage world war over the lack of sugar resources.
I calmly sit in my kitchen eating fried banana-cheesecake.
the cheesecake was a lie. you start to discover your whole life is a lie and suddenly everyone becomes depressed.
i turn my double-bladed battleaxe into a spoon
You use the it to eat a bowl of unsweetened oatmeal grimacing at how bad it tastes without sugar.
I send you an invite to join Weedalot's partners-in-crime, who are attempting to take over the world. I mention in that invite that you will be one of the privileged few who would have access to sugar.
their plan is foiled when someone discovers sugar cane.
suddenly gangnam style starts playing.
A flash mob of knights in Haven 3 suddenly dance to the song, cowboy-trampling any poor soul trapped in the sea of ludicrousity.
All your sugar cane fields are cut down to make bats for a game of Snipe-ball east of the haven fountain.
the bats fly away because its always day in haven.
the snipes start getting bigger all of a sudden, attracting thousands of knights into that haven.
I crack open barrels of whiskey and the knights get drunk.
I give slingshots and shovels to the drunk knights.
They kill each other and become stupid
I drink all of the whiskey and become drunk as hell
You pick up a slingshot and shoot it.
The rock bounced off the tree that was right in front of you and hit you in the head.
After that rock killed me, I became huge
I gave Iamnoone a cookie
/takes cookie and noms on it
Thanks Ben.
I patch the hole in Ben's head and find a way to bring him back to life.
I get back to life.
I drive a plane full of cookies
Military planes surround you and offer you protection.
The media catches word of this and every television news channel and every newspaper carries the story. Everyone knows about the plane full of cookies.
I then hack into the newspaper computer and make it say "Artist WANTED. Anybody who finds Artist gets a reward of billions of dollars. Artist wanted for stealing cookies"
Fortunatly, I picked up Iamnoone and put him in the cookie room
I got bored in the cookie room.
Using colored icing, I painted every cookies with a unique face.
I made somebody else drive the plane and was shocked at Iamnoone. I tell you HOW DARE YOU!?!? So I decided to go to the other room full of cookies and put on icing at the cookies.
I ate a cookie
The military planes had nothing to protect and flew away.
The cookies being gone wasn't reported on the news and cookie hungry people shoot the plane down.
I turned on my force field
Some stranger pushes you, but I saved your life and killed the stranger
I kill you and gives a cookie to iamnoone,
I went to find A good T2-3 guild to join. (no really, I dropped my old inactive guild to look for a more active guild)
You watch this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YL39uLs86o and checkout that, http://wiki.spiralknights.com/Aegis_Team_(Guild) then tell Chirzmaniac noone sent you.
I wonder if Ben watched the video yet.
You wonder for a million years.
I slap you silly.
Your hand tells you that slapping people is bad and slaps you in the face.
My proto bomb gets really sad just sitting around unused in my arsenal and decides to spontaneously turn itself into a dinosaur.
It was hit by a meteor.
I rode an eagle.
The American Wildlife Confederation shoots you down for riding a sacred symbol of their country.
I join the AWC.
You sent in your membership dues and got a thank you note from the Anti Women Coalition.
Big hairy women protested against women haters in your front yard.
They get so tangled up in each other's hair, they all fell down onto the ground and became a black hole.
I need some metal sheets for learning how to weld them together.
You get high carbon stainless steel sheets.
Your welding teacher fails you because you never learned how to weld them together properly.
The teacher decided that I should be passed because I was too sexy for her
I did nothing
For doing nothing you spontaneously combust.
All of us were wiped out from the explosion
The explosion came from nowhere, so therefore it was nothing, making us, being blown up by the explosion, cease to exist in this dimension of reality.
I cease to exist.
You do not actually cease to exist, but instead, you were just horribly mangled from the explosion.
I am not mangled because I was down the street buying a cup of coffee, and the explosion didn't reach me.
the coffee exploded
the explosion was very big so all of us were wiped out (again)
the coffee exploded
the explosion was very big so all of us were wiped out (again)
I managed to get into a fighter jet and fly away from the explosion's radius.
The fighter jet ran out of fuel.
The fighter jet crashed and exploded
We didn't get wiped out
The fighter jet was stocked with live chickens.
The explosion cooked them permeating the neighborhood with the wonderful smell of a barbeque.
The hungry people cry because they can't find the source of the smell.
I make Gandalf the Grey kill Persef for double posting.
I got money for sending you to hell and jail
Nothing happened because you didn't post and after so i'll start a new one
Something came from the ground
It tried to eat Persef.
I feed it caffeine coated cap'n crunch cereal.
After the monster killed everyone it ate their brains.
The monster went after everyone's pets.
The pets combined into one big super snipe!
The snipe and the beast had an epic battle
The snipe cut off the monsters head and ate it.
When the snipe pooped an eye, that wasn't chewed, was looking out at you from the pile of poop.
Used the poop as fertilizer, sold the eye as a 'glass' eye.
Someone died from wearing the 'glass' eye.
And Barack Obama and Mitt Romney become best friends! (Ahaha, I frigging love that picture.)
I start a secret cult in this peaceful world of ours and conspire with my partners-in-crime and together we take over the world from behind the scenes. We call ourselves... The Illuminati.